It’s my least favorite day of the year.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna cry uncontrollably all night long?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna projectile vomit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna shoot a gun out their car window to celebrate?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna start a fight?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna shit their pants?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna get a blow job in the back room?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Who’s gonna tell the doorman he and 14 of his friends should get in free because “I know the dishwasher’s assistant”?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I fucking hate New Year’s Eve. If I could be The Grinch Who Stole NYE I would in a heartbeat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
But we gotta get through it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I’m wearing my PBR hoodie, shorts, and a red fedora with a white feather that was once worn by a Blind Bear contestant in Queen of the Vine. And sandals, of course. The outfit is a total fuck-you to people who believe you HAVE TO dress up for New Year’s Eve.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By the way, I have a comment about suggested dress on NYE. I’ll save it until later out of respect for friends, though.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
One reason I think my friend Butt Slut #1 may be my sista from another mista is that she hates dressing up as much as I do. That’s highly unusual for a woman. The difference is, I don’t have a best friend who may talk me into dressing up. If Butt Slut #1 shows up in a dress I’m gonna laugh at her so hard.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
So, my plan for today is to get to Blind Bear at 11 AM and… yeah. Stay there until about 1 AM. I mean, what else is there to do on this stupid day but drink?<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Oh! That reminds me. People were asking me how much it costs to get into the Bear tonight. After 7 it’s $25 general admission and $35 to sit at a table. They’ll have wristbands that give you in-and-out privileges.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Grizzlies have a back-to-back this weekend: They play New Orleans today and Sacramento tomorrow. Both games are at 7 and will be on Bally Sports Southeast.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Tigers play Tulane on the road tomorrow at 4. That game will be on ESPN.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Time to go laugh at amateurs. Back tomorrow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
It’s my least favorite day of the year. Who’s gonna cry uncontrollably all night long? Who’s gonna projectile vomit? Who’s gonna shoot a gun out their car window to celebrate? Who’s gonna start a fight? Who’s gonna shit their pants? Who’s gonna get a blow job in the back room? Who’s gonna tell the doorman … Continue reading “Happy Shitshow Day”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26313"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=26313"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26313\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":26315,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/26313\/revisions\/26315"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=26313"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=26313"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.paulryburn.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=26313"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}