Thursday update: Angry waitress, downtown without a Vue, tube tops

Didn’t get around to voting yesterday. After work I had a news article I wanted to post on the Residents for a Safer Downtown Memphis website, so I took the laptop to Sleep Out’s and knocked it out.

To my female readers: I strongly suggest you click over to the RSDM website and click on the News link. My newest article is about a new, sophisticated breed of purse snatchers that are operating throughout the city but seem to be targeting Beale Street in particular. If you go out this weekend, be sure to keep an eye on your purse at all times, and only leave it in the care of people you are sure you can trust.

So tonight I will definitely go vote after work. Then I am going to the Peabody rooftop party, and this week I mean it – there have been a few weeks in a row when I have said I am going and then didn’t make it. This week I’m ready to go have some fun. If anyone wants to meet me up there, I’ll be there about 7:30.

Bumper sticker I saw on the way down here: “Draft SUV Drivers First” Amen!

What else is going on… one of the waitresses at the Saucer is mad at me. “I’ve seen you at Raiford’s twice and you didn’t dance with me either time!” she told me. I further compounded the problem a few minutes later. A gorgeous blonde who used to work at the Saucer walked by the Second Street window, and I commented that the blonde was my favorite Saucer waitress of all time. “What?” said the already-mad-at-me waitress, “*** I *** AM YOUR FAVORITE WAITRESS OF ALL TIME!” Geez. I can’t seem to please anyone these days. To make matters worse, I couldn’t remember her name – all I knew was that it both started and ended with an A. So for the rest of the evening, I called her Althea, Atlanta, Antarctica, Acrophobia, anything that started and ended with an A. I wonder how many times she spit in my beer.

An article in the Commercial Appeal this morning says that The Vue will not be built. The Vue was to be a 28-story apartment building at Main and Gayoso, which would have brought much-needed rental units to an area overrun with condos. The developers tried to secure financing for three years, but could not get it. They cited the fact that rents have not risen to keep up with construction costs, and therefore it was not feasible to build the building as rental units. That’s quite a blow to Downtown. Pretty much everything is converting to condo and you have to have some serious money to live in the core part of downtown. There are some rental units left but you’ll be lucky to find a decent one-bedroom for less than $900 a month. Not everyone can afford that, especially not people in the arts and education and people fresh out of college. The lack of rental units decreases diversity in the community and I hate that.

All right. In honor of Tube Top Month Extended, let’s have some fun. I’m going to click the Random Article link on Wikipedia and relate whatever comes up to tube tops.

First off, we have European Legions, an album by Norwegian black metal band mayhem. I doubt there are many tube tops in Norway, it’s too cold to wear them there.

Next up is The Mountebanks, a comic opera. Operas make me fall asleep. If I ever go see The Mountebanks, perhaps I’ll take a date in a tube top so I have something to focus on to keep me awake.

Next is “Hurricane Neddy,” the eighth episode of the eighth season of The Simpsons. A hurricane approaches and everyone panics but Ned Flanders, who remains calm. Of course, I was writing about The Simpsons on this blog just the other day, commenting that Marge Simpson wears the same dress every day and my friend Meredith should take after Marge and wear the green tube top every day.

Next we have Lowville, Wisconsin, population 987. The article gives various statistics about the town but doesn’t mention how many women in Lowville wear tube tops.

Okay, one more. Let’s see what comes up: Militias in Bermuda from 1612 to 1815. Tube tops had not been invented back then, so I doubt tube tops were part of the uniform.

Aren’t you glad that you only have to endure a few more days of this tube top nonsense? I’ve decided not to do a theme for August. I’m tired of having a topic that I have to work into every post.

As usual, I’m at the Union Avenue branch office composing this lunchtime post. Cool, there’s a Romanian working! I’m going to log off and talk to her.