I went to Court Square today for lunch, where Wendy’s was giving out free burgers for its Great Taste Tour. As I predicted, they didn’t know what they were getting themselves into – every bum, vagrant, homeless person and pigeon in town showed up. I ran down there about 10:45, right after the event started, and there were already 100 people in line, most of whom appeared to be either homeless or bums.
Each person in line got their choice of a Wendy’s Single or the new Baconator. I ran home and e-mailed a friend who thinks the Baconator is the best thing ever… he works in East Bumblefuck and there’s no way he would’ve been able to get Downtown to get one in the middle of the day, so I just had to rub it in a little.
Went back up there about 12:30, got in line, still 100 people long but by that time only 50% bums. It took 15 minutes to make it to the front. The guy behind me asked if they were giving away free beer with the free burgers. The guy behind him kept shouting “I WANT THAT BURGENATOR! I WANT THAT BURGENATOR!” the entire time. You can’t buy comedy like that. I should’ve brought a video camera.
They were also handing out gift cards for people who didn’t have time to stand in the long line. I was going to see if I could get one for my friend, but they came by and stamped my hand while I was waiting.
I finally got to the front of the line and they handed me a Baconator and a Coke Zero. I’ve got to hand it to the Wendy’s people, they were VERY efficient and they were not phased at all by the bums. I stayed for a few minutes to watch legendary street person Willie N. annoy people and to watch one of the finest examples of pigeonhood ever seen in Memphis peck at a slice of pepperoni pizza, then went home and ate.
Some pictures of the event:
My Internet connection was somewhat spotty at home, so darn it, I had to pack up my laptop and take it someplace with a more dependable connection. And beer. And waitresses. Gotta keep workin’ you know. Attempting to sit at my favorite window seat without my laptop getting rained on. Not sure how well this is going to work.
But, I like sitting at the window because then I can play The Window Game. Every day we sit in the window and count how many of certain things we see on Second Street. The categories:
Bums
Police cars
Cars that turn the wrong way onto one-way Second Street
Hooptys
Appearances by homeless person Scratchy
Cars making a left turn that aren’t in the left lane
FUMOT (F’d up modes of transportation)
Looks like I may not be going to Court Square for “Bands, Beer and Bums” tonight after all, because we’ve got even more rain moving in. So I may get to play an extended session of The Window Game this afternoon.