Month: March 2008

Got a request from a reader this morning that I wanted to pass on to everyone… she and her husband are planning to move back to Memphis soon, and want to find an apartment in the Downtown core where they can walk to everything.  They checked out the listings under my “Apartments” page, but they wonder if there are more apartments or condos in the area that are being rented out on an individual basis.  They’re thinking of something like a space above a business or restaurant that has been converted into apartments, or maybe a condo in a building like Barton Flats that someone bought as an investment and is renting out.

If you know of anything e-mail me at paul@paulryburn.com and I’ll pass it on.  Thanks.  If you know or hear of a place, if you can send me the contact info as well as the address, that would be a big help.

Greetings!  I have much news to report.  But before I get to that, let me announce that the Rapscallions took second place in trivia last night, raising our total to $250 for the next party.

Also before I get to the news, let me post a pic (taken last night after trivia) of my BFF and her mini-me, doing what they do best:

Damn, did my BFF fall asleep in a tanning bed and not wake up for like 3 days or something?

At one point my BFF and her mini-me came over while we were playing trivia and said, “Look, Paul!” and pointed out that they were wearing the same skirt.  Without missing a beat, I asked, “Are you wearing the same underwear too?”  We’ll see more BFF and mini-me pics later in this post.

Henry Rollins plays the Daisy this Saturday night.  biography

I received an e-mail asking me to remind y’all that the Rajun Cajun Crawfish Fest on Wagner just in front of the river (between Union and Beale) happens Sunday, April 20, from noon to 6.  I am disappointed in myself due to my activities at last year’s crawfish fest (left for the Saucer at 2:45, never came back).  That’s not going to happen again.  This year I’m at the festival the entire 6 hours.  More news about the crawfish fest as the date approaches.

Main Street Dental is holding a fundraiser April 4 10 AM-5 PM for Sunny Meadows, safe haven for pets.  Custom bleaching trays for $100 ($500 value).  They’re also holding a silent auction… items from Flemings, Majestic Grill, Grizzlies, etc.

Congrats to the Majestic Grille, whom Forbes Traveler recently awarded the title “Best Steak in Memphis.”   They’ve now declared Wednesday “Patrick’s Famous Chili Day” and Friday “New England Clam Chowder Day,” for those who want to have their favorite soups on a regular basis.  They’re having a wine tasting featuring the wines of Francis Ford Coppola on March 26.

Beer report:  Hey, the Saucer managed to scan all three of my beer tickets from Sunday without losing any of them!  Great job guys!

Previous total:  $471.00

Beers 88, 89, and 90 (but 83, 84, and 85 according to the Saucer):
Old Peculier $5.50
Sam Adams Black Lager $4.00
Stella Artois draft $5.50
Tip $15.00 x ~ 30% = $5.00
Total $20.00

Grand total: $491.00

Time for more BFF and mini-me pictures.

 

Finally a pic of someone other than the Nuh-Uh Girl eating.

 

My BFF is going to kill me for posting this one.

Time to go to work.  Got assigned a big project yesterday that’s going to require a lot of brainpower and energy.  After work:  Itta Bena 5:30-7:00, then I’ll head to the Saucer at 7 to do my 3 beers and watch the Tiger game.

Very little news to report today.  It was raining cats and dogs after work.  I stuck a Walgreens bag over my head and ran to the Saucer for Pint Nite.  The place was absolutely dead… no one wanted to get out in rain and possible severe weather.

Beer report:  The Saucer managed to lose ANOTHER of my beer tickets.  When I logged on to the Beer-Tron-A-Ton (UFO computer) last night, my “official” (officially wrong) total should have been 80, but it showed up as 79.  I’ve logged onto the website and have received notification that some of my beer tickets didn’t count because I tried to turn in more than the maximum 3 per day.  Hello, I’m a former math teacher, I think I’m capable of counting to 3.  What’s really happening is that someone is forgetting to scan some of the tickets ’til close, and they get scanned the next day, and then when I come in to drink my 3 it shows that I’m already over the limit for that day.

Anyway… beers 85, 86, and 87 by my count; 80, 81, and 82 by the Saucer’s:

Murphy’s Stout draft $2.75
Paulaner Hefe-Weizen draft $2.75
Black & Tan $2.75
Tip:  $1 x 3 beers = $3.00
Total $11.25

Previous total $459.75

Grand total $471.00

After my three plate beers and a Dos Equis Lager, I decided I was hungry for Mexican.  So I ran up the street to Rio Loco.  It was still raining just as hard, but the temperature had dropped 20 degrees.  I had a jacket on, but otherwise wasn’t prepared for cold weather with a T-shirt and sandals, and nearly froze to death getting up there.  I had combination #28 – chalupa, tamale, and poblano pepper, and it was more food than I could finish.  Rio Loco has Dos Equis Lager on tap so I didn’t have to interrupt my beer drinking for dinner.  The staff was watching WWE Monday Night Raw on one of the TVs.  I like that place.

I meant to go back to the Saucer after that, but it was just too cold.  So I walked home and called it an early night.  I was in bed at 9:58, so I got more than nine hours sleep last night.

Sloooow news day – the only thing I have heard about is a “Race & Media” forum presented by New Path and the Memphis Urban League next Tuesday, March 11, from 5:30-7:30 PM at the central library at 3030 Poplar.  This is the second forum in their 2008 Race Relations in Memphis series.  Panelists will include Chris Peck, Bruce VanWyngarden, Karanja Ajanaku, Emily Greene and Leon Gray.  Event is free and open to the public.

Tonight’s trivia night at the Saucer (7:00), which means somewhere in Memphis right now, Pete the Trivia Guy is probably practicing writing “Rapscallions” on $50 gift certificates in preparation for tonight.  As always, if you don’t feel like losing to us, there’s trivia on Mud Island at Tug’s (8:30).

People have asked me if the Red Rooster will be open to watch the Memphis Tigers game tomorrow.  As far as I know, the answer is no… it’s an away game, so they won’t have an extra 10,000 people a block away as potential customers.  If they don’t open, my plan will be Itta Bena at 5:30 tomorrow and the Saucer at 7:00.  If they change their minds and open, I’m sure I’ll receive 10 text messages about it over the next day and a half, and will post an update.  If I didn’t have unlimited text messaging on my phone, I’d be PISSED at the Rooster for the amount of bulletins they send out via text.  Those things generally cost money to be received as well as sent.

Today is primary day in Texas and Ohio.  If Obama wins Texas, I wonder if Hillary will finally realize it’s over and drop out.  I need to get an Obama banner for my blog.

Time to go to work.

What a near-perfect weekend. Weather was great and I had a good time. Bartender Amy bought first round for those of us who showed up for brunch at McGuinness. I finally found my regular drink at McG brunch, a 6.3 oz. bottle of champagne that sells for 4 bucks and has alcohol equivalent to a beer. It brought back memories of very early Sunday brunch days (circa spring 2003) with Kit and Kelly and Terry and Randy and John D and others, before I got into the mimosas, and just did straight champagne. I plan on having several of them when I go back there next Sunday for brunch.

Let’s start with a pic from Friday night. The girl pictured below celebrated a very special birthday March 1 (Friday night was 2/29, but this pic was taken after midnight). I am proclaiming March “buy this girl a drink” month if you see her out:

As I walked to McG today, I looked over to Autozone Park and remembered that baseball season has already started, in a sense… if you want to head Downtown to watch baseball, you don’t have to wait for the Cardinals exhibition games or the Redbirds season opener. You can come Downtown and watch Memphis Tigers baseball now. It’s probably the best sports deal in the city. More info here.

After chasing bums for a couple of hours, I got hungry and went to Big Foot for dinner. I had the meatball caesar salad again, and to drink I had the Blue Anchor at bartender Terry’s recommendation. It’s one of the massive 34 oz. mixed drinks on the $9.99 menu, and the description reads, “A sorority favorite featureing Skyy orange vodka, blue curacao and Red Bull.” Sounds like I was drinking a girl drink. Who cares, it got the job done.

Speaking of food and drink recommendations… regular blog reader Air Traffic Mike tells me that the scalloped potatoes at the Majestic Grille are the best things ever. He had them with a filet, scallops and broccoli this weekend. Damn that sounds like a good meal. Definitely worth ordering as an extra side or a substitution for a side, he tells me.

After I got done at Big Foot, I headed to South Main to Calhoun’s to see bartender Lauren and drink $1.50 PBR. They have a bar that you can write on with Sharpies. Here are some of the quotes from the bar:

“Corn don’t grow on Rocky Top
Soil’s too rocky by far.
That’s why all the folks on Rocky Top
Get their corn from a jar.”

“I love a chick with a closet full of D batteries”

“I have 99 problems and Lauren is 85 of them”

Also, females apparently get free beer if you sleep with a particular one of the regulars. I need to set up that type of deal for myself.

I took the opportunity to draw on the bar myself. See below:

The image of the gun was not my doing, that was already there and has nothing to do with the announcement pictured above.

I saw a couple of people get the sausage & cheese plate and it was a LOT of food for $8.

Beer report:

Previous total: $435.50

Beers 82, 83, and 84 (but 78, 79, and 80 according to the Saucer):
Yazoo Pale Ale Fire Sale $2.75
Orval Trappist Ale $11.00
Pair of Tits (mixer – Woodchuck Pear + Tennent’s) $4.50
Tip: $18.25 x ~30% = $6.00
Total: $24.25

Grand total: $459.75

For those of you reading the blog from out of town, let me give you a Memphis weather update.  It’s 64 degrees as I type this at 10:15 AM, with a predicted high of 75 and low of 58.  I just ran to Jack’s for my morning Mountain Dew and did so in a Hawaiian shirt and shorts.

I will also wear the Hawaiian shirt and shorts when I leave in a few minutes to go to brunch at McGuinness.  For those of you who are female and are planning what to wear today, I have a suggestion… tube top.  Perfect day for it.

You know, last week I read an article on how church attendance is declining in America, and a substantial percentage of the population has switched their religious affiliation from a mainstream Christian church to “unaffiliated” over the last 25 years.  I can definitely relate, as I quit going to church almost as soon as I went through the motions of being confirmed as an Episcopalian, and I consider myself unaffiliated now.  With churches desperately trying to attract and retain members, I thought to myself this morning, what could a church do to convince me to show up on Sunday?  And it hit me… if there were a church that encouraged its female members to wear tube tops to services, that would be a church that would have a good chance of recruiting me.

Anyway, back to the weather… this time around it won’t be nice for long.  Forecast is for a high of 38, low of 32 and some type of precip on Tuesday.  But by month’s end it will be consistently nice.  Really looking forward to three consecutive weeks of festivals next month, which mark the longest interruption of the year of my regular Sunday brunch plans.  First Rajun Cajun Crawfish Fest, then Wine Race, then Music Fest.  At all three I tend to wander around and talk to people all day.  Fun.  I don’t actually go to Music Fest, but I wander Main, Beale, Second and surrounding streets, which usually turns out to be considerably more fun.

One of my readers reports that there’s an “opening soon” sign of the door of the Corkscrew on South Front, so that liquor/wine store may be about to have a rebirth the way Frank’s Liquors did a few months ago.

The Cooper-Young neighborhood is going to start doing a monthly event similar to South Main Trolley Tour, where all the shops and galleries will run extended hours and restaurants will have special dishes and food specials.  It will be the first Thursday of every month, kicking off on April 3.  More details here.  Hmmm… that’s just about perfect distance for a bike ride from Downtown.  May have to show up.

Probably will NOT hang out at the Saucer all afternoon like I usually do… if the weather is as pretty as predicted, I’ll likely tab out about 2:30 and walk around looking for bums and tube tops.  Wonder if I’ll see fellow Saucer regular Bicycle Bobby sporting a Hawaiian shirt today.

I have a song the Dempseys played last Thursday stuck in my head now… “Runaway” by Del Shannon.  It was a #1 hit in 1961.  I bought it on iTunes this weekend.

Time for Sunday Fun Day to begin.

I stayed out until 3 AGAIN.  Yay.

Tonight I meant to call it an early night, but it turned out not to be because I was at Hoop’s Bar and had a long conversation with the two girls who want to be guest bloggers on my blog.  They have nicknamed themselves “Glo” and “Flo,” and have requested that I never reveal their identity or post pictures which could tie them to those names.  They say they want to write articles providing insight into the female mind, and invite reader questions.  I threw them a couple of sample questions, and while their answers made no more logical sense than any other woman I’ve talked to, they were entertaining nonetheless, and that’s the main point if I want to keep reader traffic high.  They said they could also offer a female alternative to events I go to.  “We’ll go to the Wednesday night thing at Itta Bena,” they told me.  “You can write about the food and the drinks, and we’ll write about the fashions people were wearing.”  I kind of resent their insinuation that this is not already a fashion blog.  Remember June?  Hello!  Tube Top Month, anyone?

Anyway, I talked to them for quite a while, and based on some of their comments – particularly Glo’s comment, “Random making out is AWESOME!” – I think they may work out as guest bloggers.  Glo, I may need a physical demonstration of that comment, though.  We still need to work out the details but it’s possible they’ll be blogging here within the next week.

Speaking of tube tops:  I saw several today, the first day in a long time that it’s been warm outside.  I love tube tops.

Hoop’s Bar has asked me to do a video interview for their new website.  I’ve seen a sneak preview of their new website, and while I don’t want to spoil the surprise, I will throw this teaser out there – you WILL NOT BELIEVE who won Employee of the Month.  I was completely shocked when I read it.  Not that the person who won didn’t deserve it, but I mean, wow.  The announcement totally caught me by surprise.

Beer report:

Previous total:  $422.00

Beers 79, 80, and 81 (but 75, 76, and 77 according to the Saucer):
Tecate can $4.00
Tsing Tao bottle $4.25
Flying Dog In-Heat Wheat bottle $4.25
Tip:  $12.50 x ~30% = $4.00
Unpaid cover due to UFO card $-3.00
Total: $13.50

Grand total:  $435.50

Walking home from Hoop’s Bar, I ran into one of the new waitresses who had just closed the Saucer as she was leaving, and she told me, “Paul, go the f*** home.”  They’re so nice to me there.  Friday one of the girls had her birthday and tried to get me to give her $100, then she reduced it to $20.  Then she complained that I didn’t have a present for her.  I went and got a copy of free Memphis Sport magazine off the rack near the door and said “Here you go.”

I guess I’ll go to bed now.  Brunch at McGuinness at 11 AM unless I oversleep.  After that, Saucer, and a Calhoun’s run before the end of the day isn’t out of the question.

It’s March! March just may be my favorite month of the year. It’s the first month of the year when it’s pretty consistently warm enough to wear shorts most of the time, and it’s usually the first month of the year where I run the air conditioner more than the heater. I love air conditioning. It’s 67 outside and I can’t wait to get out there.

Only 8 more days until Daylight Saving Time.

Only 7 more weeks until Rajun Cajun Crawfish Fest.

Only 8 more weeks until Wine Race.

Only 2 1/2 months until BBQ Fest.

Only 3 months until Tube Top Month. Although, it’s perfectly acceptable to go ahead and start wearing tube tops now.

A new sports bar may be coming to Downtown. The Memphis Business Journal reports that Ozzie Smith, who has a sports bar in St. Louis, may be interested in opening one here. They are looking at the former Have a Nice Day Cafe space at Fourth and Beale, and also a spot near the Red Rooster. The MBJ article interviews one of the owners of Calhoun’s to ask if he is worried that another sports bar Downtown will cut into his business. He need not worry. I looked at the menu on Ozzie’s Sports Bar’s website and it is the kind of generic crap menu you find at Chili’s, Applebee’s and other restaurants that people who live in East Bumblefuck go to. As much as I respect Ozzie, I can’t see Downtowners who already know about Calhoun’s relocating to the new sports bar. Calhoun’s goes out of their way to make their customers feel like they’re at home. I spent a couple of hours there last night catching up with Mikey the Camera Nazi, Otto, and various others who popped in.

I had a female reader e-mail me with a request: “More pictures of Skippy please!” I have a video from August 2006 of him dancing at Sleep Out Louie’s… want me to upload that to YouTube and link to it?

I have heard from a credible source that the armed robbery that supposedly happened on Beale Saturday night, and which was reported in a Union City paper, is a hoax. What I’ve heard is that the dude got his ass kicked and made up the robbery story to try and look like less of a fool. Didn’t work.

Interesting site I found this morning, quite by accident: DateACougar.com. I bet Philip will be saving that one to his bookmarks. If you don’t know what a “cougar” is, this Wikipedia entry will explain it. Then again, if you live in Downtown Memphis, you don’t need a cougar dating website; just go sit at the bar at the South Main restaurant that has valet parking, I hear that place is the “cougar lounge.”

I tried the Red Rooster solo last night… I had previously only been with groups. The place was packed and everyone seemed to be having a great time. That place is going to make it. Unfortunately I was dead tired from staying out late the night before, so I didn’t talk or dance much. Left about 2:30 and walked up Second toward home… but I happened to walk up the street at exactly the time the people who closed the Saucer were walking out. “Paul, come have a drink with us at McGuinness!” they said. I wanted to go to sleep SO badly… but you know I’m not going to say no to a drink at McGuinness. So I hung out there until close, then the night was finally over.

Now it’s time for the beer report – a double beer report, since I didn’t do one yet for Thursday. Both Thursday and Friday nights I came in the Saucer after they started charging cover, and since I had my UFO card I didn’t have to pay.

Beer report for Thursday night:

Previous total: $392.25

Beers 73, 74 and 75 (but 69, 70, and 71 according to the Saucer):
St. Peter’s Ale $6.25
Pilsner Urquell draft $4.50
Red Stripe bottle $4.00
Tip: $14.75 x ~30% = $4.00
Unpaid cover due to UFO card $-3.00
Total: $15.75

Grand total: $408.00

Notes about Thursday night’s beers: St. Peter’s Ale is one of my favorites because it looks like it comes in a flask. I love to sit in the window and drink it and make the bums who walk by jealous. The Pilsner Urquell draft was a mistake, as I meant to save it for a Pint Nite. It printed on the UFO computer (“Beer-tron-a-ton”) receipt as a bottle; however, there are no Pilsner Urquell bottles at the Saucer. A good waitress would have noticed this and at least asked if I still wanted the beer. However, I didn’t have a good waitress that evening; I had my BFF. So she brought me the draft and told me to shut the f up when I protested. Red Stripe brings back good memories. When I was in college at Rhodes, we used to drive over to the beer distributor on Warford and buy cases of it for 8 bucks.

Friday’s beer report:

Previous total: $408.00

Beers 76, 77, and 78 (but 72, 73, and 74 according to the Saucer):
Flying Dog Doggie Style Fire Sale $2.75
Barbar Blonde $7.00
Miller Lite draft $3.25
Tip: $13.00 x ~30% = $4.00
Unpaid cover due to UFO card $-3.00
Total: $14.00

Grand total: $422.00

I highly, highly recommend the Barbar Blonde, a new bottle they have at the Saucer. It’s a Belgian style beer with hints of honey and orange peel, and it’s 8% alcohol.

Plans for today: As soon as I shower and get dressed, I’m going to go out and snap photos of bums. The gang is talking about watching the 3:00 Tiger game at someone’s condo, but that sounds boring so I’ll probably watch it at the Saucer and get my 3 beers for the day done. After that, don’t know.

(Edit: Forgot to hit Publish, so you’re getting this morning’s post at 8 at night. Sorry.)