Month: November 2022

Tennessee’s hopes of a College Football Playoff invitation are dead. And I love it.

The Vols got blown out 63-38 by South Carolina yesterday. It was glorious to watch. It’s said to be the most points scored by an unranked team against a Top 5 opponent since 1936.

I knew the Vols would do this. They always find a way to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory. “WEEEEEEELLLLLLLLL DOGGIES… I GUESS WE AIN’T MAKIN’ IT TO THE PLAYOFFS THIS YEAR… BUT LET ME TEEEELLLLL YOU WHUT BOYYYYYEEEE… NEXT YEEEEEEEAAAAARRRRR…. I THINK THASSSSS GONNNNN BEEEEEEEE ARRRRRRR YEEEEAAARRRRR”

Losers. Bleacher Report: “This was an embarrassment. It was the type of loss a team takes when the moment is too big, and the Vols now are out of the playoff picture.” Yep.

More good news: Memphis shut out North Alabama 59-0 to become bowl-eligible.

Even more good news: Arkansas became bowl-eligible after defeating Ole Miss 42-27. How about an Arkansas-Memphis bowl game? That’d be fun. Birmingham Bowl? Gasparilla Bowl?

Penny’s Memphis Tigers host VCU at 4 today at FedExForum. Great matchup against a perennial NCAA tournament contender. The Tigers have a new court design.

Today’s National Peanut Butter Fudge Day. And it’s NFL Sunday. How much fudge could the Packers pack, if the Packers could pack fudge?

Fair warning: This is going to be a very slow week on this blog. Thanksgiving is a very slow news week and I have some tasks to get done. I’ll post when I can.

Time to go sit at Kelly’s bar and inflict damage on my liver. Back tomorrow or Tuesday.

 

 

Reminder: THE PLACE TO BE tonight is the Blind Bear for a ’70s party from 10 to 2:30. It’s a birthday/going-away party for our Tuesday happy hour bartender Ry. The theme will be ’70s (dress up if you’ve got the clothes) and Tree and Taz will be playing the tunes.

Now, there is one problem… as most of you know, I don’t wait until 10 PM on a Saturday to start drinking. (Hell, I didn’t wait until I hit WordPress’ “New blog post” button to start drinking this morning.) I absolutely cannot overdo it and crash in my bed by 7 PM today. But it’s Bardog Saturday this morning and there are always plenty of rounds of shots. The problem could be exacerbated today since it’s the Saturday closest to my birthday.

So, this week, I took my Saturday Bardog bartender aside for a conference. “You can’t let me get hammered doing rounds of shots,” I explained. “I have a late-night party I cannot miss.”

“Okay,” she ssid. “We’ll limit you to one shot on Saturday.”

“Whoa… whoa… whoa…” I replied. “No need to be THAT strict. How about three?”

“Three,” she said. So if I turn down a shot from you this afternoon, please don’t be offended. It’s gotta be a long day. A marathon, not a sprint.

It’s National Carbonated Beverage with Caffeine Day. I recommend a Mountain Dew.

The Grizzlies won last night but Ja was injured. Dammit. The team is in third place in the Western Conference, 0.5 games out of first place. Next up: A road trip to Brooklyn tomorrow. There’s speculation that Kyrie Irving might return for Sunday’s game.

The Risky Whiskey Boys will musically celebrate the life of Jerry Lee Lewis today at 5 at his cafe on Beale.

Logan Hogue and the Blank Checks play Tin Roof tonight at 6:30.

Grape. plays the Clover Club tonight at 7.

Strip club The Pony is having a Wild Wild West & Breast Thanksgiving party this weekend. They’ll be raffling dances at midnight.

“Ucey in the Sky with Diamonds.” OMG.

Time for a little hair of the dog at Bardog. I may not have time to post tomorrow morning but we will see.

MemphisWeather.net calls for a high of 44 with northwest winds at 10 MPH. Yeah that’s not shorts weather.

That won’t stop me from doing some birthday day drinking, though. If you’re off work, feel free to come join! My tentative schedule for today:

• 8:00 AM to 11:40 AM: Bardog (Allie Cat’s bar)
• 11:45 AM to 3:00 PM: Local on Main (Jessica’s bar)
• 3:00 PM to ????????: Blind Bear (Cinnamon’s bar)

I don’t anticipate it being a super late night because I have to conserve my energy for one of those tomorrow.

The Grizzlies are back at home tonight, where they’ll face off against the Oklahoma City Thunder tonight at 7.

Mas’s Sports Bar has announced an opening time of noon for all Team USA World Cup games. The schedule as it stands now is

• Monday, November 21 vs. Wales
• Friday, November 25 vs. England
• Tuesday, November 29 vs. Iran

The Flying Saucer has announced its annual Turkey of the Year glass, to go on sale next Wednesday at 7 PM. The theme this year is Will Smith – “Slapsgiving.”

Memphis 901 FC is looking for a new head coach. Ben Pirmann has left to become the head coach of Charleston Battery.

Today is Married to a Scorpio Support Day.

It’s also Mickey Mouse Day. Yep, I share a birthday with the Mouse.

Get your brake lights repaired for free tomorrow.

The Green Beetle food truck will be in Health Sciences Park from 11:30 AM to 1:00 PM today.

Buffalo, NY could get 5 feet of lake-effect snow this weekend. The forecast is so bad that Sunday’s Bills NFL home game has been moved to Detroit.

The Stumbling Santa pub crawl returns Saturday, December 3. Meetup point is the Flying Saucer at 7 PM. Bring an unwrapped toy for Porter-Leath and dress up as Santa (or Mrs. Claus, an elf, a reindeer, a Christmas tree, etc.) This is far and away Downtown’s best pub crawl of the year.

My friend who works in an Olive Branch liquor store alerted me to a new flavor of moonshine yesterday:

Photo credit: Butt Slut #1

Butter pecan! I showed the photo to a guy who was taking inventory at Blind Bear and said “Y’all need to get this.” He said he thought he had just seen it in the cooler. Here’s a suggestion for you: Go to the Christmas tree lighting at Main and Peabody Place tomorrow afternoon. Grab a free cup of hot chocolate, take it to Blind Bear, and spike it with a shot of butter pecan.

BIRTHDAY!!!!!! Time for some drankity dranks. Back tomorrow.

Very sad to hear of the death of Arcade restaurant owner Harry Zepatos. I’m praying for the Zepatos family and am sorry for their loss.

Tonight at the Halloran Centre: Robert Moody Presents the Orchestra Unplugged: Vivaldi The Four Seasons

Reba McEntire plays FedExForum tonight with special guest Terri Clark.

Ben Yay’s is now accepting orders for Thanksgiving pickup. Call 901-779-4125 no later than November 22 to place your order. Pick it up between 11 AM and 9 PM Wednesday, November 23:

• Cajun turkey $65
• Bourbon glazed ham $60
• Half pan of crawfish dressing $65
• Half pan of Cajun mac & cheese $45
• Half pan of Cajun yams $40
• Half pan of green bean Almondine $50
• Half pan of Bourbon peach bread pudding $45

Making that bullet-pointed list reminded me – it’s time to have a look at college football games of interest to Memphians this Saturday:

• Navy at 20 UCF, 11:00 AM, ESPN2
• Illinois at 3 Michigan, 11:00 AM, ABC
• 4 TCU at Baylor, 11:00 AM, FOX
• East Tennessee State at Mississippi State, 11:00 AM, ESPN+/SEC Network
• North Alabama at Memphis, 1:00 PM, ESPN+
• 1 Georgia at Kentucky, 2:30 PM, CBS
• 2 Ohio State at Maryland, 2:30 PM, ABC
• Arkansas State at Texas State, 4:00 PM, ESPN3
• 5 Tennessee at South Carolina, 6:00 PM, ESPN
• 14 Ole Miss at Arkansas, 6:30 PM, SEC Network
• 7 USC at. 16 UCLA, 7:00 PM, FOX
• 10 Utah at 12 Oregon, 9:30 PM, ESPN

Overheard at the bar at Local on Main yesterday: “Yes, I have spoons at home. They say ‘Eat My Ass’ on them.”

Sugar Grits hosts Brunch with Santa Saturday, December 3.

The CA has a look at Steve Richardson, one of the few Black vendors at Memphis farmers’ markets.

Figgy Pudding Spam is something the world did not need.

The CA has a look at the status of the Downtown Mobility Center planned for the corner of Main and Beale.

And that’s all the news I have for now. Tomorrow’s my birthday so I may take the day off from posting so I can get to Bardog right at 8 AM.

Aldo’s Pizza Pies Downtown has added paninis to the menu:

Both the Grizzlies and the basketball Tigers lost last night. The Grizzlies’ Desmond Bane is out 2-3 weeks with a toe injury. In the meantime, it looks like they’re sliding Dillon Brooks over to the 2 spot and starting John Konchar at small forward.

Blues City Cafe is featured in Action News 5’s latest 5 star story. There was a Robert Plant sighting there recently. He’s said to be in town working on an album.

In other Beale Street news, Silky’s has new owners. And the owners have a familiar name: David Hooper and his wife Anna. Hooper operated Hoop’s Bar at Second and Beale from 2007-2008.

The Woodruff-Fontaine House will hold a Yuletide Open House Friday evening, December 9.

Wiseacre Downtown (and Broad Ave.) will show all the World Cup games and you get 10% off your tab if you’re in Team USA gear.

Yup that exists: A Coors Light nail polish that changes color when your beer is cold

The Grizzlies will celebrate Small Business Saturday on November 26 with a Shop Local event from noon to 3 in the FedExForum grand lobby. Food trucks will be there and the first 500 attendees get a Let’s Shop Local bag. If you’re an MVP season ticket holder, you get a members-only preview hour from 11 to noon.

You can tour Old Dominick tonight and talk to Tennessee’s first female head distiller, Alex Castle.

Tonight is trivia night at Cordelia’s Market. 6:30 start time.

Giant wooden otters children can play in have been delivered to Tom Lee Park as part of the ongoing renovations.

Today is Have a Party with Your Bear Day. I’ll be celebrating the holiday at the Blind Bear this afternoon and evening. Happy Hour with Cinnamon runs from 3 to 7, and there’s karaoke with DJ SuperBrad at 9. Check it out just to have the experience of hearing Michael, Big Andrew, and Coyote sing a song together. (Hey Coyote, you got mentioned again!)

The return of Disco Man (somewhat): You may have heard that I used to wear full ’70s disco attire to Sunday disco nights at Six-1-Six in the Nineties and to Raiford’s in the early ’00s. Well, I’m bringing elements of that persona back Saturday night at my friend Ry’s birthday/going-away ’70s party with DJs Tree and Taz at Blind Bear.

From the waist up I’ll be Disco Man. I have a groovy two-tone denim cap, complete with a hidden pouch to hide a stash. Also I have a wild polyester checker pattern shirt that still fits. I’m going to dig through my dresser. drawers and see if I can find my gold medallion.

From the waist down, not so much. I was a 32 waist back in the day, and thanks to our good friend alcohol I’m about a 36 now. Also, I was a size 8 shoe back then, but my feets have since grown and I’m a size 10 now. No chance I’ll be sporting a pair of platform shoes.

Anyway, that’s it for now. I should be back tomorrow.

Penny Hardaway’s Memphis Tigers play a road game against the Saint Louis Billikens tonight at 8. CBS Sports Network will carry the action. It will overlap slightly with the Grizzlies-New Orleans Pelicans game, which comes on TNT at 6:30.

Jaren Jackson Jr. has been upgraded to “questionable” for tonight’s Grizzlies game, which means it’s likely he’ll see some minutes.

Just in time for Thanksgiving: Green bean casserole seltzer

The Memphis Flyer has a look at TV series Young Rock, now being filmed in Memphis.

Blind Bear has another new flavor of Ole Smokey moonshine: eggnog. I tried some last night and it was delicious. On Facebook, I proposed a strawnananog moonshine mixer, one-third each of white chocolate strawberry, banana pudding, and eggnog. However, Butt Slut #1 shut down the idea in a comment: “That sounds yucky.” You used to be fun, butt slut.

Speaking of the Blind Bear, they’re throwing a ’70s party with DJs Tree and Taz this Saturday from 10 PM to 2:30 AM. Come celebrate Ry’s birthday and enjoy some disco and funk. I gave Ry’s boyfriend my baby blue leisure suit to wear to the party.

Lizzo will come to FedExForum Wednesday, April 26. Tickets go on sale this Friday at 10.

Eight & Sand announced its DJ lineup for this weekend:

• Thursday: DJ Alpha Whiskey
• Friday: DJ Spinna from New York City

Comedian/TV host Trevor Noah comes to the Orpheum on May 4. Tickets go on sale this Friday.

Last night a possibly crazy person told me I look like a long-haired surfer from Santa Fe. Note that Santa Fe isn’t within 500 miles of an ocean. He was making weird comments like that to a lot of people and eventually he got kicked out.

Today is Clean Out Your Refrigerator Day, a holiday I don’t observe. I think that circa-2016 Aldo’s pizza box looks pretty darn good in my refrigerator.

Oh, dear lord: Another broken water main. Front and Adams this time.

Earth’s population reached 8 billion this week.

That’ll do it for today’s post. Back tomorrow or Thursday.

So, I’m a bit disappointed this morning.

I have a new “Know When to Hold’em” T-shirt from Ocean City, Maryland. It features a beautiful woman wearing only bikini bottoms, holding two playing cards over her nipples – presumably the Queen and Jack of spades, which would complete a royal flush. I was hoping someone would come up and tell me they were offended by my shirt. I enjoy offending people.

Alas, no one said anything to me about the shirt.

The Daily Memphian has a story (subscribers-only) about the incredibly stupid bill that would ban drag shows and other “adult cabaret” shows in public venues and some private venues. Such performances wouldn’t be allowed in private venues where it would be possible for a minor to view them, either because they’re inside the venue or could see the show through a window.

That means burlesque at the Blind Bear would not be affected if the bill became law. They’re 21 and up after 3 PM (the shows begin at 10:15) and they have a black curtain that blocks the view of the inner entrance.

I worry about the Friday and Saturday night drag shows and the Sunday brunch shows at Atomic Rose and also the new Sunday brunch drag show at Hard Rock Cafe. Those venues have a lot of windows that would need to be covered up.

Let me explain my position on drag shows… on a micro, personal level, I don’t like them. They do nothing for me. Seeing a “show” is not a reason I go to a bar. And I don’t like the expectation to tip for a performance I don’t care about.

Yet, on a macro level, I think drag is beautiful. It’s people expressing themselves to the fullest, and not only being appreciated for it, but making a living from it. What could possibly be wrong with that? That’s what we should all strive to do, each of us in our own way.

I think it’s vitally important that people like me oppose the bill to ban drag shows. Let people be who they want to be and let our children see it.

Not surprisingly, the Grizzlies lost to the Washington Wizards last night with Morant and Bane sidelined. Good news, though… Jaren Jackson Jr. is now practicing with the team and may appear in games as early as this week.

Next up for the Grizzlies: A date with Zion Williamson and the Pelicans Tuesday night at 6:30 in New Orleans. That game will be on TNT.

Today is National Pickle Day. My suggestion to celebrate would be an order of fried pickles from Kooky Canuck. They come with honey mustard for dipping.

Action News 5 has a look at this past weekend’s SneakFest at FedExForum.

Crap, it’s going to rain tonight. MemphisWeather.net gives us an 80% chance. 39 degrees. I hear Axl Rose in my head singing about the cold November rain.

If you take Airways to work, plan an alternate route – it’s closed between South Parkway and Park due to an active scene.

It’s my birthday week! The actual day is Friday but I plan to start celebrating today. Back tomorrow with more news.

 

Well, the Turkey got me yesterday.

And I don’t mean Thanksgiving turkey.

We were talking to a tourist at Bardog yesterday and he invited us to join him in a shot of Wilf Turkey. Not long after that, I was (to borrow an expression from Neal) D-U-N done.

Apologies to those who were expecting to see me at Blind Bear last night. I left Bardog at 6:30 last night and went straight home, got in bed, and slept for 11 hours.

The Grizzlies hit the road to play the Washington Wizards at 5 today, but this will be a tough one – our three best players are all doubtful for the game.

The DM has a look at Elmwood Cemetery’s tree tours. Did you know that Elmwood, now right in the heart of Memphis, was once considered a rural cemetery?

The DM has a list of restaurants offering prepared Thanksgiving meals to go. Downtown:

• Chef Tam’s
• Primas (desserts)

Comedian Nate Bargatze’s Raincheck Tour is at the Orpheum today.

From Emerging Tech Brew: Building a “smart” city will require thinking beyond cars

The Downtown Christmas tree lighting happens at approximately 4:50 Saturday afternoon. Free at the event:

• Photo booth with Santa
• Dinstuhl’s candies (first 200 kids)
• Musical performances
• Hot chocolate

The Memphis Urban Market happens at No. 2 Vance (whose street address is, oddly, 325 Wagner) this afternoon. The market offers health and wellness products by Black-owned businesses.

Not Downtown but it sounds cool enough to be worth getting in a car: Book signing with Chuck Berry biographer RJ Smith Thursday night at 7 at Stax Museum. Don’t feel like driving? The museum lies within Groove on Demand’s coverage area.

Hunting expert Kenny Corder will be at Bass Pro at the Pyramid today from noon to 4 sharing tips for waterfowl season.

Buff Bagwell makes an appearance at Memphis Wrestling today out on Winbrook Drive.

Grape. plays Memphis Clover Club Saturday at 7.

I was very happy to see TCU defeat Texas yesterday, a game that was considered an upset by many. That means that the CFP top 4 all won and will likely remain unchanged next week, keeping 5 Tennessee on the outside looking in. I need all of the top 4 to win out so America’s most horrible fan base doesn’t go to the playoffs.

That can’t happen, though, because 2 Ohio State and 3 Michigan have an upcoming game. For that game, I need Michigan to win 56-54 in 7 overtimes, with a controversial call by the referees on Ohio State’s final play in the 2-point conversion shootout. I want to leave no doubt in the playoff committee’s minds that both of these teams deserve to remain in the top 4.

LSU clinched the SEC West with a win over Arkansas yesterday. How weird is it going to be to see an SEC title game without Alabama in it?

How ’bout those Vanderbilt Commodores? They upset Kentucky 24-21 to get their first SEC win in 3 years. 4-6 Vandy still has a shot to get bowl-eligible. All they have to do is beat Florida on Saturday and then BEAT TENNESSEE on the 26th. I’ll be rooting for you, ‘dores! (And yes, I do have a reason to cheer for Vandy other than the intense hatred I have for the Vols. My uncle got a degree in electrical engineering there.)

I’ve seen surprisingly few COGIC people this week. I guess it’s because I hang out in bars and they don’t drink (in public). Still, I wonder if Blind Bear brunch will be slammed today.

Today is the last day of Downtown Dining Week.

That’s it for today’s post. Back tomorrow or maybe Tuesday with more news.

When it gets crowded and noisy in Downtown bars, my introverted nature comes out. I tend to go deep inside my own mind. That happened yesterday afternoon.

I was thinking about the place where I worked in North Mississippi for nearly 9 years. There was a large pond outside that ducks and geese and the occasional crane would visit. It was connected to the Horn Lake creek system by a drainage canal.

I thought, what if fish name those drainage canals the way we name streets? How do we know the drainage canal running by my former office building isn’t Fish Poplar?

The Grizzlies improved to 9-4 with a win over Minnesota last night. They are 3rd in the Western Conference still, a game behind 1st-place Utah and a half-game behind second-place Portland. If Desmond Bane keeps playing at this level, Grizz ownership is gonna be dipping into the luxury tax to sign him to a max extension when it’s time.

Memphis Farmers Market holds its annual Turkey Day Market next Saturday, November 19, from 8 AM to 1 PM under the pavilion at Front and G.E. Patterson behind Malco Powerhouse. Come get some fresh veggies to complement your turkey.

By the way: Question that was asked on Facebook about Thanksgiving recently: Green bean casserole: Yay or nay? I’m a huge YAY on that one!!!

Another question that came up on Facebook this week: What is one city you’d never visit, based on its reputation? KNOXVILLE!!!

‘Tis the season: Wendy’s is releasing a holiday Peppermint Frosty. I see some walks to the Danny Thomas Blvd. location in my future.

There will be Fire Pit Fridays in December from 4:30 to 6:30 in the afternoon in River Garden Park. Holiday lights and tunes and s’mores over the fire.

The DM has a look at yesterday’s Veterans Day parade.

Today is Fancy Rat & Mouse Day. Cheers to my bartender Allie Cat who has been celebrating that day all week.

Today is also National Pizza with the Works Except for Anchovies Day.  I’m not a huge anchovy fan but I’d rather have them on my pizza than pineapple.

Coloradans voted to decriminalize magic mushrooms this week.

ABC 24 has a look at Downtown Dining Week dishes from The Genre, Primas, and By the Brewery.

Central BBQ Downtown seeks a BBQ pit operator.

NBA.com has a Q&A with the Grizzlies’ Dillon Brooks.

There’s a Party in the Park in Court Square today from noon to 4. It’s a fundraiser benefitting veterans and their families. DJ, food trucks, craft vendors, photo booth. Tickets are $25. Attendees are asked to bring a new or gently used coat, jacket, or sweater to donate.

Counting the minutes until Bardog time. Back tomorrow with more news.

Grizzlies on national TV alert: Memphis hosts Minnesota tonight at FedExForum at 8:30. The game will be televised on ESPN. The Grizzlies’ 2022-23 “Big Memphis” City Edition uniforms, celebrating our city’s connection to hip-hop, will make their debut tonight.

The big local news of the day is the change in the weather. Get those winter coats out of storage, because you’re going to need them. Today is the last day we will crack the 60-degree mark for a while, and tonight we’ll drop to the mid-30s with rain moving in after 10 PM. Read more on the MemphisWeather.net blog

This commercial cracks me up:

Medicare Martha. She reminds me of some of the people who sit at the corner table at Max’s Sports Bar.

Super excited about upcoming movie The Iron Claw. I haven’t been to a movie theater in years but I’ll go for that one. David von Erich was my favorite wrestler before he died.

Today is Veterans Day. Cheers to those who have served or are serving.

Desmond Bane got fined $15,000 by the NBA for kicking the basketball into the stands Monday night,

ABC 24 spoke to drag performer Moth Moth Moth about the ridiculously stupid bill in the Tennessee legislature that would ban public drag performances. Moth says the bill would threaten her livelihood.

Hmmm the bill bans “adult cabaret” in public… would that mean the end of burlesque at the Blind Bear too?

Play drag queen bingo while you still can at the Moxy Hotel tonight at 7. Imagene Azengrabber hosts.

Heardle is a Christmas music-themed game.

Yesterday I was told, “You should come to Max’s Saturday morning and talk trash to the Tennessee fans about losing to Georgia.” Believe me, the thought has crossed my mind. But I enjoy my Bardog Saturdays with Randy and Theresa and Butt Slut #1 to give them up at this point. Although, Butt Slut #1 may be unavailable tomorrow due to house-sitting responsibilities. Hmmm… her nickname implies the existence of a Butt Slut #2. Can we get a pinch-hitter for tomorrow?

Attn Dwayne Johnson AKA The Rock: Sometime when you’re filming your TV show in Downtown Memphis, you need to come in Local on Main at lunchtime and smell-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-a. What Miss Helen. Is cooking. (eyebrow)  I’ve read there’s a lot of fish in your diet. Friday is fish & chips day.

That’ll do it for now. Back tomorrow with more news.