Thursday update

Memphis Farmers Market has announced its annual Turkey Day Market for this Saturday, November 18 (my birthday!!!) from 9 AM to 1 PM. Not only will you be able to buy Thanksgiving dinner fixings from area farmers, but you’ll also be able to start early on your Christmas shopping. Local artisans will be on hand with crafts, art, and jewelry to sell.

Folks from the Cossitt Library will be at the Market for Story Time from 11 AM to 1 PM Saturday. The Market is at the corner of Front and G.E. Patterson under the pavilion, behind the Power House movie theater.

Action News 5 interviewed the Cossitt Library’s Chef Eli about this Saturday’s Eat This Book Festival.

A mixed-use 8-story high rise has been proposed for 500 Beale. That would be between Danny Thomas and Lauderdale. The location is currently a vacant lot.

It’s Red Cup Day at Starbucks. Order a handcrafted holiday beverage and get the 2023 edition reusable cup. Order in person, on the Starbucks app, or through DoorDash or Uber Eats.

Marathonfoto seeks a photographer for the upcoming St. Jude Marathon.

Megabus has discontinued its service from other cities to Memphis.

Today is Nouveau Beaujolais Day.

Also it’s Have a Party with Your Bear Day.

And it’s National Fast Food Day.  I recommend a 6-pack of Chili Cheese Pups from Krystal to celebrate.

Ugh.. Tennessee Sen. Marsha Blackburn has been mentioned as a potential vice-presidential pick alongside the Trumpster for 2024.

That’s it. Fairly short post today. Back tomorrow.

Wednesday update: Just hanging out with the kids

An anonymous person arranged for baby goats for Jess to hang out with prior to the start of her shift.

The goats are from 901 Goats, a farm in Fayette County. The one Jessica is holding is about 4 weeks old. The goats on leashes are 10-11 months. Their caretakers were feeding them Cheerios.

The goats can be booked for goat yoga classes – at your place – for around $600, I’m told. We’re talking about getting a group together. If we got 30 people that’d be only $20 each.

Specials at Local on Main today:

Mississippi pot roast with stewed okra

Gumbo hash

Let’s have a look at college football games this weekend of interest to Memphians:


  • Colorado at Washington State, 9:30 PM, FS1


  • Chattanooga at 8 Alabama, 11:00 AM, ESPN+
  • UL Monroe at 13 Ole Miss, 11:00 AM, SEC Network
  • 24 Tulane at Florida Atlantic, 11:00 AM, ESPN+
  • Southern Miss at Mississippi State, 11:00 AM,  SEC Network
  • Abilene Christian at Texas A&M, 11:00 AM, SEC Network
  • SMU at Memphis, 11:00 AM, ESPN2
  • 22 Utah at 17 Arizona, 1:30 PM, Pac-12 Network
  • Texas State at Arkansas State, 2:00 PM, ESPN+
  • 1 Georgia at 18 Tennessee, 2:30 PM, CBS
  • New Mexico State at Auburn, 3:00 PM, SEC Network
  • 21 Kansas State at 25 Kansas, 6:00 PM, FS1
  • 5 Washington at 11 Oregon State, 6:30 PM, ABC
  • Florida at 9 Missouri, 6:30 PM, ESPN
  • Florida International at Arkansas, 6:30 PM, ESPNU
  • Kentucky at South Carolina, 6:30 PM, SEC Network
  • Georgia State at 15 LSU, 7:00 PM, ESPN2

My thoughts on this week’s schedule, summed up in one photo?

More teams playing cream puff opponents than we’ve seen since Week 3. I guess this is a safety valve adopted by many teams to ensure that 6th win – and bowl eligibility. Although, it looks like a few teams may get waivers to sneak into a bowl with a 5-7 record this year.

Today is National Zinfandel Day.

New Ballet Ensemble School’s NutRemix comes to the Cannon Center this weekend. Imagine The Nutcracker, but on Beale Street.

Cheers to my friend Bill who moves to Illinois today. It’s been a pleasure hanging out with you in Downtown Memphis, sir. Please come back and visit.

Experimenting with NOISY and CRATE as my starter words in Wordle. Results are pretty good so far.

Hmmm. LOUSY and IRATE might be even better…

The MOXY Memphis hotel is organizing a New Year’s Eve bar crawl. I normally hate NYE but this is not a bad list of stops. NYE is on a Sunday this year. Note that you’d be back at the hotel partying with fellow pub crawlers rather than a bunch of random drunk yahoos at midnight.

Any locals been to Bar Moxy in the hotel? Is it worth checking out on a normal, non-holiday evening? The hotel promotes it like it’s a destination for non-guests.

The Grizzlies lost to the L.A. Lakers last night, effectively reducing Memphis’ chance of winning the NBA in-season tournament to zero. Marcus Smart and Luke Kennard went down to injuries. The Grizzlies drop to 2-9. Is it too early to consider tanking for the season?

Bishop, the French restaurant in Central Station Hotel, seeks a sous chef.

Not Downtown but worth a Lyft or Uber: Pho pop-up event this Sunday

507 Lux Lounge, in the basement of Curry N Jerk at 150 Monroe, will host Cocktails & Conversations tonight at 7. This is a place for adult topics we’re usually conditioned to avoid. Tonight’s topic: How do we reach our youth?

Texan Marcia Bell comes to the Halloran Centre this Saturday. Tickets are $39.50.

A bridal & wedding expo comes to the Renasant Convention Center Sunday.

Fish & chips and a fried pork chop sandwich are the specials today at Bardog.

That’s it for now. Back tomorrow.

Tuesday update

Last week I mentioned a December 6 beer dinner at Bardog. I now have more information about that event.

It’ll be a joint venture with Hampline Brewing in Bardog’s Underdog Room called Bear of the Dog. This will be Hampline’s debut on the Memphis beer dinner scene. The menu:

Tuna Carpaccio with Handlebar Haze New England IPA

First Course:
Asparagus Bisque with Natch Lager

Second Course:
Beet Salad with Cherry Bomb Cherry Amaretto Sour Gose

Third Course:
Beef Wellington with a pilsner to be announced

Pumpkin Cheesecake with Dunk Tank Oktoberfest

Tickets are $60 plus tax and grat. Wednesday, December 6 at 6 PM.

Today is National Pickle Day. Kooky Canuck and Local on Main are two Downtown restaurants with excellent fried pickles.

Pedestrian safety is being cited as the reason why a section of Riverside Drive will remain closed on the weekends.

Electronic dance music legend Larry Heard performs with DJ Spinna Saturday night 9-1 in Eight & Sand Lounge at Central Station Hotel.

A workshop called Unlocking Your Stories: Finding Our Voice in Poetry happens Wednesday from 4 to 6 at the Cossitt Library. Ally Smith will be your presenter.

The basketball Memphis Tigers just missed the AP Top 25 this week. With 53 votes, Memphis came in 26th, just behind #25 Colorado (78 votes).

There are a couple of events coming up at South Main Sounds, 550 S. Main, this weekend. Friday from 7 to 9, there will be performances by Zoe Dominguez, Victoria Dowdy, and Sandy Lollis. Saturday from 7 to 9, Jim Lauderdale will take the stage.

Pantera with special guest Lamb of God has announced a Saturday, February 10 date at FedExForum.

The man killed in a Sunday night shooting on the riverwalk near the Butler Avenue entrance was a St. Jude employee. (Update: Two suspects have been charged.)

COGIC lost one of its leaders while its Holy Convocation was going on in Memphis. Bishop Sedgwick C. Daniels passed away on Sunday.

Iceland may be due for a volcanic eruption.

Redneck trivia at Momma’s was decided by an arm wrestling match last night. Now, I know what you’re thinking – “Paul, nobody cares” – but my former student Zach insists I put it in the blog.

By the way – I’ve never been to redneck trivia, but I heard more about it yesterday. It sounds like the TOPICS are redneck more so than the individual QUESTIONS. For example, “beer” might be a topic – rednecks like beer – but a question might be, “Which state has the most breweries in New England?”

Classic Blind Bear T-shirts are back in stock and for sale:

The Hyatt Centric seeks an assistant food & beverage manager. The hotel is also looking for a bartender for CIMAS Lounge.

Former Memphis head coach Mike Norvell has been linked to the open head coach position at Texas A&M. Norvell is currently the HC at Florida State.

The Grizzlies have an in-season tournament game tonight at 9:30, an away game at the L.A. Lakers. TV will be Bally Sports.

The updated college football playoff rankings come out tonight at 8 on ESPN.

The Sheraton seeks a director of sales and marketing.

The CA’s Jennifer Chandler has 5 spots to find a pie for Thanksgiving dinner. Notable Downtown: Makeda’s Cookies at 301 Jefferson. Makeda’s pies feature a “butterific” cookie crust.

The CA has a preview of Adam Sandler’s show at FedExForum this Thursday.

Online sportsbook ESPN BET launches today.

That’ll do it. Back tomorrow with college football and more news.



Birthday week Monday update

I want to start off by mentioning a yummy brunch pic posted by Momma’s, “the diner & dive off 55:”

First off, cheers to Momma’s on having REAL hash browns. I HATE it when breakfast/brunch restaurants advertise having “hash browns” – but then you get there and find out they’re actually “breakfast potatoes.” NOT THE SAME THING!!!!!

Chili-smothered hash browns with eggs and a choice of meat? Sounds like Momma’s may have “borrowed” that idea from Waffle House. And I have no problem with that at all! Waffle House had years to open a restaurant on Crump and capture that market, and they didn’t do it.

I’m sure many of you are designing your King Louis breakfast in your head right now. As am I! My eggs would have to be scrambled. I can’t stand any kind of eggs with runny yolk, especially touching other food. I’d sooner eat pineapple on pizza. I’d sooner eat tofu.

As for meat: I suppose sausage would work best with Momma’s Smokestack chili. Although, since this is an obvious copy of what Waffle House does, I might be tempted to get country ham since that’s what I get there. Bacon, of course, is a universal ingredient that is always welcome on my plate. I’ve never understood chicken as a breakfast food.

The real question, though, is: Which King Louis are you going to be as you eat your King Louis breakfast? You have many choices. Here are some of the most popular ones:

  • Louis the 9th  – The namesake of St. Louis, Missouri, making this a good choice for Cardinals fans.
  • Louis the 11th – Your kids will want to be him. He was the Spider King.
  • Louis the 13th – Has a high-dollar cognac (I’m talking, like, $250 a shot) named after him.
  • Louis the 14th – Has a Beatles song (“Sun King”) written about him; reigned for 72 years, longer than England’s Elizabeth II.
  • Louis the 16th – His wife was a bitch. He inherited a treasury depleted by his grandfather, the extravagant Louis the 15th. Beheaded at age 38 by revolutionaries. His son never reigned and only lived to age 10.

Forecast this week looks beautiful!

I had Bardog’s corn dog “Daily Dog” special for the second time in 2 days yesterday. That thing is seriously good enough to be a regular menu item. Mama Aldo, can you mention this to your son? EDIT: New Daily Dog today. Bacon-wrapped with sauteed onions, ketchup, and mustard.

I made Emily put The Price Is Right on. A contestant has a “The Wife Is Right” shirt on. This is why I’m single.

A fellow Scorpio (Wednesday birthday) bought me 2 Rumples and left me a full beer and half a Rumple. I’m buzzed and it’s 10:19 AM. And MEDICARE MARTHA is on TV. THE CALL IS FREE!

Congrats to the Grizzlies, who improved to 2-8 with a road win over the L.A. Clippers yesterday. Next up: at L.A. Lakers on Tuesday at 9:30 PM (TV: Bally Sports)

Tony posted a preview of a couple of the Blind Bear’s dinner specials for this week:

  • House-made chicken noodle soup
  • Pan-seared red snapper with sauteed green beans

There’s usually a dessert too. I’ll find out what that is and post a follow-up.

One more piece of Blind Bear news: Normally there’s a cover charge for admission Friday and Saturday nights. However, on Saturday, November 18, you can get in for FREE if you tell the door person, “Paul sent me.”

Grizzlies HC Taylor Jenkins has been fined $25,000 by the NBA for pointing out the incompetence of the referees working Friday’s Grizzlies-Utah Jazz game.

Today is World Orphans Day. There’s a street just north of Jackson running from Manassas to Ayers named Orphanage Ave. So I guess there used to be an orphanage just northeast of Downtown. That street was probably laid out in 1860. I don’t think there’s an orphanage on Orphanage Ave. anymore. I bet you can buy some weed there though. Probably not good weed.

The Price Is Right is giving away a hammock that will keep you warm at a temperature as low as 32 degrees outside.

A man was shot to death at Tennessee and Butler yesterday.

Drake and J. Cole will play FedExForum March 5.

The U.S. government is set to run out of money and shut down at midnight Friday.

Texas A&M fired Jimbo Fisher but will have to pay him $75 million according to the terms of his contract. Must be nice.

Here’s a TikTok about The Wingman, a new restaurant at 143 Madison.

It took me 4 hours to type this post. Back tomorrow with more news.

Birthday week Sunday update

My birthday week has begun! However, the actual day is not until Saturday.

My friend Randy returned from a business trip from Ireland, and as often is the case, he came bearing gifts. The butt sluts and I got matching hoodies.

The hoodies read, “Irish Originals Vintage Collection.” The new hoodie will be good to wear to Silky’s St. Patrick’s Day parade next March.

There were candy bars too!

This Irish whiskey milk chocolate bar was delicious! I ate the entire thing this morning. I tried a little of this dark chocolate bar too:

This a dark chocolate bar with nuts and sea salt. The inside wrapper reads,

Right now there is slavery on cocoa farms in West Africa. This is a result of the unequally divided food chain. Tony’s Chocolonely exists to change that.

Our vision is 100% slave-free chocolate. Not just our chocolate, but all chocolate worldwide.

With incredibly tasty chocolate we lead by example and show the world that chocolate can be made differently, in taste, packaging, and the way we do business with cocoa farmers.

Alone we’ll make slave-free chocolate but together as can make all chocolate 100% slave free. So we ask you to join us.

The more people who join our mission and share our story, the sooner 100% slave free becomes the norm in chocolate.

The choice is yours. Are you in?

From Food & Wine: DiGiorno has a Thanksgiving pizza out. It’s topped with turkey, gravy, sweet potatoes, green beans, crispy onions, and two kinds of cheese. You have to visit the DiGiorno website to get these and they’re only available on Wednesdays.

I tried the corn dog which has been the Daily Dog special last night at Bardog.

The batter is light and fluffy, more closely resembling a Pronto Pup than a state fair corn dog. There is no stick, so you have to eat it with a fork & knife. I don’t recommend trying to eat it with your hands – the batter will fall off. Daily Dogs are usually on special for several consecutive days, so you may still be able to get the corn dog today.

Random fact I learned at one of the other Downtown bars yesterday: If a female bartender sends you to DGX for tampons, Tampax Pearls are a good choice. They’re not the cheap brand and accomplish, um, whatever is needed in a tampon.

The bourbon slushie is back in the rotation at Max’s Sports Bar.

Charlotte took the Memphis Tigers football team to overtime yesterday, but the Tigers prevailed, 44-38. Could Memphis be in line for double-digit wins this season? They’re 8-2 right now. Remaining:

  • Saturday, November 18 vs. SMU (11:00 AM, ESPN2): Memphis is a 25.2% underdog according to ESPN FPI
  • Friday, November 24 at Temple (11:00 AM, ESPN): Memphis is an 89% favorite according to ESPN FPI
  • AAC Championship: The Tigers have an in-conference loss and three other teams don’t, so Memphis is unlikely to be in this game
  • Bowl game: Projected by CBS Sports to be in the Military Bowl on December 27 vs. Virginia Tech (currently 5-5, 4-3 ACC)

So most likely the Tigers are looking at 9 to 10 wins this season.

And then there was this LOVELY result from yesterday:

The Tennessee Vols can kiss their hopes of a New Year’s Day bowl goodbye. CBS Sports now has them projected in the Gator Bowl on December 29 vs. North Carolina.

As for Memphis’ very own Liberty Bowl, CBS Sports is now projecting Kansas State vs. Mississippi State. That game is also December 29.

The Woodruff-Fontaine House will have a Yuletide Open House the evening of Friday, December 1. Free and open to the public.

The basketball Memphis Tigers improved to 2-0 with a win over Missouri on Friday night. Next up: Friday at 7 PM, home game vs. Alabama State, TV: ESPN+.

The Grizzlies have an away game vs. the L.A. Clippers at 2:30. TV: Bally Sports

Since the Grizzlies-Clips game is time-sensitive, I’ll stop here and hit Publish. Back soon with more news.

Friday update

Regulars of Max’s Sports Bar on G.E. Patterson Ave. got a rather unpleasant surprise when they showed up at their favorite watering hole Thursday afternoon. A tall green fence had been installed in front of Max’s, blocking its entrance.”I do not like this fence,” stated one regular of almost 16 years.

There is good news, though – Max posted,

We had a surprise this afternoon – a beautiful enclosed front patio! But don’t worry, we’re still here and excited to share an evening of football, dinner, and drinks with all of you. And in case you are wondering, there’s no construction and everything is completely safe!

Today is Sesame Street Day. 54 years ago today, the children’s show starring Big Bird, Bert and Ernie, Mr. Hooper, Gordon, Cookie Monster, Oscar the Grouch (who was orange at the time!), Kermit the Frog, and Grover premiered on PBS.

There will be an International Food Tasting at Maria Montessori School on Mud Island this Saturday. The cuisine will represent international home cooking and restaurant fare. There will be a silent auction as well, and live music. $35 single, $50 double. 6-10 PM. They ask that you represent your birthplace with your attire. (Note to self: Toss “Arkansas Razorbacks – Defending the Turf Since 1871” shirt in the washer)

Riverside Drive will reopen Monday. Through traffic on the street will be allowed between Union and Georgia Avenues Monday at 5 AM to Friday at 7 PM.

The DM looks at Cocozza’s aperitivo happy hour in this week’s $10 Deal. Small plates in the $3-$10 range are available weekdays from 4 to 6 PM.

Ashley McBryde brings The Devil I Know Tour featuring JD Clayton to the Orpheum Saturday night. Tickets are $32-$75.

Catch The Magic of Rob Lake at the Halloran Centre Saturday night. Tickets are $39.50.

A Chick-Fil-A is coming to Uptown. It’ll be at the corner of Thomas and A.W. Willis. The location will be convenient to the St. Jude campus.

There will be a Latte Art Throwdown at Comeback Coffee Saturday evening. Prizes for first, second, and third. $5 entry for latte competitors. Free for spectators.

Chef Jimmy Gentry will present Vintage901 Perfect Pairings Brunch at The Lobbyist in the Chisca Apartments building this Sunday. The 3-course dinner will feature pastries perfectly paired with wine. Proceeds help fund the new Vintage901 Food + Wine Scholarship.

Campbell Clinic physicians will provide foot and ankle care for our homeless friends at Our Hearts to Your Soles at the Union Mission Tuesday, November 14. Clinic employees will pass out shoes, socks, toiletries, and snacks.

Rumors of Fleetwood Mac, a cover band personally endorsed by Mick Fleetwood, plays the Orpheum Tuesday night. Tickets are $30 to $165.

French Truck Coffee has opened a location in The Edge at Orleans Station.

All U.S. National Parks will be free to visit Saturday.

It’s possible I may take the weekend off from blogging to catch up with both friends and sleep. In case I do, let’s cover the minor holidays that will occur during my hiatus.

Saturday is National Sundae Day. Margie’s 901 is the place to celebrate.

Saturday is also National Metal Day. I recommend you stop by River City Records and add to your metal collection.

Saturday is Wine Tourism Day. I recommend a visit to Rootstock Wine Merchants out in The Edge District.

Sunday is Chicken Soup for the Soul Day. Normally I’d recommend the caldo tlalpeno at Maciel’s on Main, but you’ll have to wait until Monday to get it.

Sunday is also Happy Hour Day but good luck finding one of those until Monday.

Joe Manchin, Democratic Senator from good ole West Virginny, is retiring. That’s gonna make it easier for Republicans to flip the Senate in the 2024 general election.

That’s it for now. Back when I get the urge to post more. Could be Monday. Could be 30 minutes from now.

Thursday update

The DM is reporting that the I-55 exit to Metal Museum Drive, the first exit as traffic arrives from Arkansas, will soon close. Volume at that interchange and the nearby Crunp interchange is too heavy to be handled by the traditional cloverleaf that is there now. A roundabout will be built to take their place.

The construction will bring with it the closure of E.H. Crump Blvd. from Metal Museum Drive to Kentucky Street. I wonder if that will make it harder for people to find Momma’s, “the diner & dive off 55” which is part of the Aldo family of restaurants. Momma’s has spent substantial time closed the past few years due to COVID, business improvements, and road closures. They don’t need any more setbacks.

I’ve been seeing a commercial on TV lately, and although the company is not local, I want to mention them and give them a strong recommendation: Goldbelly.

You’ve heard of a turducken, which is a duck inside of a chicken inside of a turkey. Goldbelly has those, but that’s not what I’m here to tell you about. What you want is a piecaken.

I discovered piecaken when I went over to my friends Randy & Theresa’s place for Christmas dinner 2022 along with the butt sluts and our friend Mark. As you might guess, a piecaken is several pies and cakes combined into one. From my December 27, 2022 blog post:

“Chocolate pecan pie is the bottom layer, eggnog cheesecake is in the middle, red velvet cake on the top layer, topped with cherry pie filling (which made me think of Warrant).” I failed to mention there’s a slice of pumpkin pie in there as well.

Absolutely, positively worth an order if you want a holiday dessert that is both memorable and delicious.

I stopped by Bardog yesterday morning for a stack of pancakes and several glasses of Coke. (No I did not order alcohol there, keeping a promise I made Monday night.) While there, someone asked about the T embedded in the floor near the entrance.

I had never noticed the T before. Maybe it’s been covered up with floor mats??? Questions came up as to the meaning of the T. Here’s where we are on this mystery:

  • There’s no “T” in “Bardog,” and even Aldo doesn’t know what it stands for, so the T preceded the current business at 73 Monroe.
  • Before Bardog, the place was Mike’s, a breakfast joint I enjoyed many of my early Sundays Downtown. No “T” in “Mike’s” either.
  • Some people believe there may have been a jewelry store with a T in the name at some point in the past. No one could come up with the full name.
  • Bardog regular/blog reader/Grizzlies lawdog Davis guessed that it was an early logo for the Tennessee Vols. Davis wins the Mendatius T. Roll Award for most unhelpful response.

Mendatius T. Roll

We may have the best of the best sleuthing this case in the near future. I’ve been told the T photo is going to be shown to Vance Lauderdale of Memphis magazine. I bet he can get to the bottom of this.

Miami 108, Grizzlies 102. Memphis falls to 1-7 but remains one of the top 15 teams in the NBA’s Western Conference. Next up: Memphis hosts Utah in an in-season tournament Group A game on Friday at 7 PM. The first 5000 fans receive a Grizzlies camo bucket hat in recognition of Military Appreciation Night. TV: Bally Sports

The Blind Bear got Xfinity back so we can watch the Bally Sports channel in peace – just tune the TV to 831 and watch the Grizz in HD. No janky “smart TV” apps, no throwing the signal from a personal iPhone to a TV, no instances of one bar TV being 6 seconds behind the other one. Normally the only X I want to see involved in a Grizzlies broadcast is Tillman Sr., but for now we’ll have to deal with the Sith Lords at Xfinity.

Save the date: There will be an official Grizzlies watch party at Slider Inn Downtown Saturday, November 18 at 7 PM. The Grizz travel to San Antonio to play the Spurs that night.

Many of you drive past the Memphis branch of the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis on N. Second Street on your way to work or home. Check out a podcast: Cotton, Cash, and The King – 100 Years of the Memphis branch

2023 MIFA holiday cards are here. When you buy these cards, you’re supporting MIFA programs like Meals on Wheels and utility assistance for families in need. Send MIFA your mailing list and at least a $10 donation per card, and their volunteers will take care of your holiday cards for you.

Today is National Fried Chicken Sandwich Day. One way to celebrate would be the Downtown Dining Week special at Momma’s.

Another option would be the chicken sandwich at Local on Main:


From Action News 5: U.S. Army Corps of Engineers officials discuss a second year of record-low Mississippi River levels

We’re done with the 80s today as cooler temps and rain arrive. Twitter/X is a good way to stay informed.

I’m not a big movie person normally, but there are two movies coming out this holiday season I’d like to see:

  • Napoleon – Not so much because of The Little General, but because his foreign minister the Prince-Duc de Talleyrand was one of the most interesting historical figures of all time.
  • The Iron Claw – The rise and fall of Dallas-baed pro wrestling clan the Von Erichs. They included acrobatic Kevin; lanky, intelligent David; good-looking but dim-witted Kerry; Mike who didn’t want to wrestle at all; and Chris who wanted desperately to be like his brothers but was only 5’5″. Only Kevin lived to see his 35th birthday.

There will be Grizzlies Bingo at the Memphis Made taproom in Cooper-Young tomorrow evening. Free to play, family-friendly, Grizzlies on TV during the game.

There’s a hot wing festival at Grind City Brewing Saturday afternoon.

The Memphis Veterans Day Parade will roll down Second (originating at Market) Friday morning.

That’s it for this morning’s post. Back tomorrow.

Wednesday update

Greetings! It’s Tuesday happy hour as I type this and I’m sitting at the bar with my favorite Grizzlies Granny, Luanne. She just dropped off some awesome news.

Anita Ward will perform her hit disco single “Ring My Bell” at tonight’s Grizzlies game and the Grizzlies Grannies and Grandpas dance team will perform.

I can’t tell you how many times I danced to “Ring My Bell” at Sunday Disco Inferno night at Six-1-Six in the ’90s. In six-inch platform shoes. And then I’d get up and teach my College Algebra class at the University of Memphis Monday morning at 9:10 AM.

Sometimes I’d see my students out at Six-1-Six on those Sundays. “Professor Paul, what are you doing here?” they’d ask.

“What am I doing here?” I’d reply. “What are you doing here? You have a math test to take tomorrow. I don’t.”

The Stumbling Santa pub crawl returns to Downtown Memphis for its 19th year the evening of Saturday, December 2. Every year, hundreds of people get dressed up as Santa – or Mrs. Claus, an elf, a reindeer, a Christmas tree, you get the idea – and stumble from bar to bar on and around Beale Street.

The meeting place, as always, is the Flying Saucer at 7 that night. The pub crawl is a toy collection drive for Porter-Leath, so please bring a new, unwrapped toy to be given to a child in need. Every year Stumbling Santa raises a bus-load of toys in just one night.

The first Saturday of December is always a HUGE day Downtown, and it stays that way ALL DAY LONG. Things get started early that morning with the St. Jude Marathon. Many streets will be blocked off and you’re advised to avoid travel by car in the area between midnight and noon, if possible. If you have to drive, St. Jude and MPD will publish a list of which routes in and out of Downtown will be open.

The Memphis Tigers will be out of town, playing that afternoon at Ole Miss, but with a 1:00 PM tip time, the Downtown bars are going to be packed. The game will be broadcast nationally on ESPN2, so bars won’t need any special package subscription to be able to pick it up.

The bars will remain packed for the American Conference and SEC football championship games, both of which will be broadcast nationally at 3 that afternoon.

The bars will remain packed for the Memphis Grizzlies game at Phoenix which will come on at 8 that night.

On top of all that, Leanne Morgan will be on tour at the Orpheum with shows at 4:00 and 7:00 that day.

And Memphis Symphony Orchestra will be at the Cannon Center that night.

My point is, if you plan to do anything Downtown that day – especially anything involving a car – allow extra time and be prepared to deal with crowds. Expect parking garages to upcharge and Lyft/Uber to surge charge.

Today is National Abet and Aid Punsters Day. Jack, please let me know if I can be of assistance.

It’s also National Harvey Wallbanger Day.

The annual Memphis holiday parade will happen Saturday, December 9 at 2 PM on Beale Street. The parade used to be another event that happened the first Saturday of December. Smart decision by Beale Street management to move it back a week.

Let’s have a look at college football games of interest to Memphians Saturday:

  • 3 Michigan at 10 Penn State, 11:00 AM, FOX
  • 8 Alabama at Kentucky, 11:00 AM, ESPN
  • Tulsa at 23 Tulane, 11:00 AM, ESPN2
  • Vanderbilt at South Carolina, 11:00 AM, SEC Network
  • Arizona at Colorado, 1:00 PM, Pac-12 Network
  • Memphis at Charlotte, 1:00 PM, ESPN+
  • 18 Utah at 5 Washington, 2:30 PM, FOX
  • 13 Tennessee at 14 Missouri, 2:30 PM, CBS
  • Auburn at Arkansas, 3:00 PM, SEC Network
  • Arkansas State at South Alabama, 4:00 PM, ESPN+
  • 9 Ole Miss at 2 Georgia, 6:00 PM, ESPN
  • Florida at 19 LSU, 6:30 PM, SEC Network
  • Mississippi State at Texas A&M, 6:30 PM, SEC Network

Action News 5’s 5 Star Story this week is about the COGIC convocation.

Bella is the most popular dog name in Tennessee.

That’ll do it for this morning. Back tomorrow with more news.

Tuesday update

The University of Memphis women’s soccer team will host LSU in the first round of the NCAA tournament Saturday at 7 PM at the soccer/track & field complex at the university’s Park Ave. campus. Go Tigers! Memphis Tigers, that is.

The DM reports (premium subscriber-only article) that Bally Sports will carry Grizzlies games for the remainder of the season, having struck a deal. I want to add something, though: Area bars are finding it difficult to use the Bally Sports app to stream games. Apparently you have to stream the games through a personal device such as a phone or iPad and then share the signal with the smart TV, which has to be logged into the same Wi-Fi (or Bluetooth?) network.

Getting the games on the smart TVs has proved so challenging that some neighborhood watering holes are considering dropping their Bally app subscriptions and returning to a partnership with The Evil Empire – Comcast/Xfinity – to show games.

The Memphis Tigers men’s basketball team improved to 1-0 on the regular season with a 94-77 win over Jackson State last night. Next up: at Missouri at 8 PM Friday with TV coverage on the SEC Network. ESPN BPI has Memphis as a 54/46 underdog to yet another set of Tigers.

Today is Hug a Bear Day. Are there any stuffed bears left in the Blind Bear’s back room? I haven’t been back there in a while.

Today is also International Merlot Day.

Food festival news from the Cossitt Library:

Chef Eli will headline the Eat This Book Festival Saturday, November 18 from 11 AM to 3 PM. Free food samples, food trucks, and crafts. I’ll be around the corner at Bardog getting butt-ass-wasted for my birthday, but maybe I can stumble across Front and stop by.

The Grind City Music Festival has been announced for April 5 and 6 at the amphitheater at Grind City Brewing Co. in Uptown. Alt-country and Americana acts will be the focus, in particular Whiskey Myers. I don’t know who that is but I’m sitting at Billy’s bar at Local as I type this and Billy says he’s good.

Two-day passes are $109. There’s also a VIP package for the festival that includes perks like beer tastings, dedicated bars and viewing areas, special artist performances, and an after-party.

In case you’ve ever wondered what happens at a holy convocation, here’s COGIC’s schedule for the week.

AutoZone Park will host a Deck the Diamond Spectacular, a holiday event opening the day after Thanksgiving. It will be a winter wonderland with 190 lit structures and a 60-foot Christmas tree. In left field there will be a skating rink. Christmas food and beverages will be available. Event calendar

I just learned the circumference of a wood MLGW pole: 42 inches.

Bluff City Media discusses what can be done to improve attendance at Memphis 901 FC matches.

Choose901 has a list of best local spots for sports watch parties. Downtown venues include Max’s, Birdie’s, and Green Beetle. Attention John D: Did you know Birdie’s hosts Formula One watch parties?

Take your dog to trivia at Ghost River on Main this Wednesday. Free dog treats; bonus prizes from Hollywood Feed. Dogs encouraged but not required for trivia teams.

Project Green Fork’s annual Reharvest Memphis fundraiser happens Thursday evening, November 16, at Beale Street Landing.

And now it’s time to answer the question on all my readers’ minds: What have the butt sluts been up to lately?

We’ll start with Butt Slut #2, who is a blonde who bartends at one of the (adjective) (animal) bars Downtown. Downtown Dining Week has already taught us a valuable lesson about Butt Slut #2.

If you work in the kitchen of a restaurant that opens at, say, 5:00 PM, and Butt Slut #2 has informed you she’ll be there right at open, you better be in there no later than 2:49 PM preparing the croutons for her salad. If her croutons aren’t ready, she’ll pitch a fit. I lost count of how many times she said “croutons” last night.

Thinking about it a little more, it might be a good idea to go ahead and install a crouton vending machine. Then Butt Slut #2 could have Croutons on Demand (COD) whenever she wants.

Sunday I attended the memorial service in Uptown with the butt sluts, then we went to the Blind Bear. The Philadelphia vs. Dallas NFL game was on.

Philadelphia scored and I applauded. That didn’t sit well with Butt Slut #1, a brunette who used to work at the same (adjective) (animal) bar as Butt Slut #2 and still picks up shifts there sometimes.

“You’re cheering against Dallas just to make me unhappy,” Butt Slut #1 said. “That really hurts my feelings.” Butt Slut #1 grew up in Dallas.

“It’s just a football game, butt slut,” I laughed. “No need to take it so personally.” I explained how I grew up in Little Rock during the Southwest Conference days and was therefore conditioned to root against all things Texas.

“I see,” Butt Slut #1 said. “So you think the DALLAS COWBOYS are a COLLEGE team that plays in the SOUTHWEST CONFERENCE and that’s why you hate them so much. Makes perfect sense.”

“I haven’t always rooted against the Cowboys,” I said, digging my grave even deeper. “I used to go to Monday Night Football parties at EP Delta Kitchen, which was in the space that was most recently Hard Rock, with Pete. They had a complimentary buffet for everyone who was ordering drinks. Pete and I bonded over chili dogs and I rooted for the Cowboys because they were his team.”

“So you BONDED with PETE,” Butt Slut #1 responded. “And OBVIOUSLY, you’ve NEVER bonded with ME!!!!!”

This is the kind of thing I have to put up with from those two.

But there is good news. Butt Slut #1 and I had a heart-to-heart talk last night. There are legitimate reasons why she gets her feelings hurt when people she cares about root against the Cowboys. Now that I understand her better, I won’t be anti-Dallas anymore.

Now, if someone can convince me to stop rooting for whoever plays the Tennessee Vols, that will truly be an accomplishment.

It’s 1:48 PM and I am very late getting this supposedly morning update published. Still at Billy’s bar at Local. The regulars are discussing a fundraiser to replenish the fund to buy peanuts for Steve the Squirrel. For a $1 donation you can wear the squirrel suit while you sing karaoke. Yes, there really is a squirrel suit.

Okay, that’s enough for today. Back tomorrow with a look at Saturday college football and whatever else I decide to write about.