Category: Uncategorized

Just picked up a flyer about Wendy’s “Great Taste Tour” which will make a stop tomorrow at Court Square from 10:30 to 2:30. “Come by and enjoy a FREE Wendy’s burger hot off the grill, made with fresh, never frozen, beef and your choice of toppings.”

The event will also feature “Burger Wisdom.” The flyer says, “Listen, learn and become enlightened as our resident burger experts spread the gospel of Burgerology.”

There will also be burger games and trivia with the opportunity to compete for prizes.

More info at thisismyburger.com.

It appears that the Handling-Panhandling online forum has played a key role in removing one of Downtown’s most aggressive and dangerous panhandlers from the streets. If things work out he’ll be gone for years. More details to come within 48 hours, after I talk to a couple of people.

Since this blog has acquired some new readers in the past two weeks, let me take a moment to mention the Handling-Panhandling forum again. Back in July Downtowners got fed up with the large numbers of overly aggressive panhandlers in the area, as well as the crimes that accompany panhandling (car break-ins, public urination, etc.) We formed an online discussion group where we talk about the problem panhandlers, where they “work,” and their routines. Members can also post pictures. The police and several community organizations have joined, and we’ve had several successes interrupting the lifestyle of the most intimidating panhandlers.

The forum is about aggressive panhandling, not the homeless problem, although that’s certainly an important problem as well. Most of the aggressive panhandlers are not homeless, and most homeless do not panhandle. So, discussion of the homeless is generally considered off-topic in the forum, although we do let people post about organizations that help the homeless as a way to redirect public generosity away from the panhandlers.

If the forum sounds like something you want to join, here’s a link. You’ll need to tell us why the panhandling issue is of concern to you, and then one of the moderators (either myself or Mike King) will approve you and you’ll be in. Once a member be sure to look at the “Pages” section, where we’ve created info pages about the worst panhandlers in the area. This section, from what I’ve been told, was key in taking down one of the worst of the worst yesterday.

Again, more info to come, stay tuned. Two more posts to come today, if not more, neither about bums or panhandling.

Usually Sunday brunch is an all-day affair for me. The gang starts at either Majestic or McGuinness then moves to the Saucer about 1. Most of the gang gets tired and leaves by mid-afternoon, but I often hold on well into the evening hours and on occasion have even lasted until close at midnight.

Not so yesterday. We started with brunch at McGuinness, where I had one of the best salads ever – their Cashew Chicken Salad. It’s pricer than most at $11.95, but you get this HUGE bowl that’s really big enough for two meals. Chicken and cashews and lettuce and veggies in sesame sauce – very good. It’s on their summer salad menu, so if you want to try it you better act fast, this being the middle of October.

We moved to the Saucer just before 1 PM. My friends Air Traffic Control Mike and Ken and I got on the pool table. After a lousy first game I decided that something needed to be done to improve my pool playing, so I contemplated a shot of Jager. While I was contemplating Mike bought me one. About 30 minutes later a second shot arrived. Sure enough, my pool game got better around that time.

About 2 my stalker showed up, in street clothes with a friend. See, when women have stalkers it’s weird and creepy, but if a guy has a stalker it’s a good thing, as long as the stalker is hot. Which this girl is. I continued to play pool and the stalker and her friend sat in the corner and tried not to get caught glancing over in my direction. My waitress came by and informed me that my stalker had asked me to buy her a shot. So I did, and one for myself. That made 3 shots for me. Normally I only drink beer on Sunday and never do shots, at least not since Sleep Out Louie’s closed. I need to train my current bartenders to make duck farts. Actually, the Saucer can’t, they don’t have all the ingredients. Maybe I’ll teach Hooper and Tony how to make them once Hoop’s Bar opens.

My stalker’s friend invited me to come sit with them, and we talked for a while. While we talked another shot of Jager showed up, compliments of Mike. That made 4. Before long I was chasing my stalker around the benches in the Saucer’s outdoor room, and she threw ketchup at me and luckily for me she missed. After she and the friend left, two guys who had been watching us called me over. They told me it was the funniest thing they had seen in a while, and THEY bought me a shot. That was number 5, and all of them were Jager. And I was drinking beers this whole time too, although I did have the common sense to intersperse a couple of waters.

I must have lasted a little past 5:00, because I remember giving the 5:00 waitress a hug and mumbling incoherently. Then I walked home and fell asleep. That’s the earliest I’ve retired from Sunday brunch in quite some time, perhaps all of 2007. And thanks to those shots I bought the girls it was one of my most expensive tabs at the Saucer, nearly rivaling the infamous “47 and change” tab.

The good thing is, because I went to bed so early I had enough time to fully recover. And that’s good because I have a lunch meeting with an IT recruiter at noon at Sauces. Yep, I’m finally giving up on this consulting thing – it’s just not bringing in the number of hours I need to remain financially stable – and returning to the world of work. Maybe later in the day or tomorrow I’ll post a summary of my skills. If 800 people a day read this thing maybe some of them know of some jobs. I actually already have several good leads, so this time it will be a matter of learning of a number of jobs and picking the best one, rather than begging for some company to please please take me.

Sauces has been open almost a year and I still haven’t had a real meal there, so I’m looking forward to lunch. Been checking out their menu online this morning. Several people have recommended the roasted garlic and onion burger, but there’s a chance I may get to kiss someone later in the day so that might be a bad idea. Also considering the fresh mozzarella sandwich or the spicy pork lettuce wraps. Hmmm. I’ll decide when I get there. I’m intrigued by a mozzarella sandwich, but there’s still something in the back of my mind that says, “If it doesn’t have meat on it, it’s not a real entree.”

Pint Nite tonight at the Saucer. Undecided on whether I’ll move over to EP’s for Monday Night Football at 7:30.

Last night I got invited to an awesome block party, even though it wasn’t my block. The condos on the block of South Main, Huling, Front, and Nettleton got together to throw a party from 6 to 10 yesterday evening, and as a friend of several of the condos’ residents, I got to come. They had food from The Majestic Grille and The Arcade, and there were two Flying Saucer kegs of beer.

About 5:55 PM as I was heading down there, I got a call from one of the event’s organizers. I knew they were getting two kegs, Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat and Pilsner Urquell. However, the tap they had would not work with the Pilsner, so they had to make a run to the distributor and substitute a second keg – and it happened to be Dos Equis Special Lager. So my two favorite beers from the Saucer were on tap at the party. NICE.

But here’s the weird thing… I ended up playing the role of the one person who stayed sober. For some reason I never got drunk at any point. Perhaps the food helped. Perhaps it’s because I was not doing keg stands as some of the other members of the group were. I have pictures and am very tempted to post them but I suppose I better not. Keg stands of Sunset Wheat? That’s just asking for trouble.

Several of the block’s residents came up and said they read my blog, and when I mentioned earlier in the week that I was going to a private party on Friday, they knew which one it was. Nice meeting you!

Music was provided by the West Tennessee Wife Swappers, who were absolutely excellent. The combination of the music and the beer got the crowd dancing and everyone was having a great time. The event organizers are talking about making the block party a twice-a-year event.

Most of the gang headed to Pearl’s after the party, and I thought about joining them, but then I thought, “You know, I just there last Saturday.” So instead I went to the Saucer, although I was there last Saturday as well. And last Friday and Thursday and Wednesday and Tuesday and Monday and Sunday and the 68 or so days before that. The Wife Swappers were playing there too. I took a seat on the planter that was propping open the doors between the outer Garden room and the indoor “nonsmoking” (bullshit) room and listened to the band.

You know, I really HATE Friday and Saturday nights. I much prefer to go out Monday through Thursday, and of course on Sundays for brunch. Last night it finally occurred to me why I hate weekend nights so much: People come out and try to do everything they can to show off their status. So as a result the bars are full of these stupid-ass dudes who use various strategies to show everyone that they’re high-status alpha males. One strategy is “talking shit,” pointing out other people in the bar and making disparaging remarks about them in an attempt to raise your own status by lowering theirs. Another strategy is “kicking some ass,” getting into fights with other bar patrons, because nothing says high status like bruises and a possible trip to jail. And, of course, there’s the most popular strategy of all, “getting some pussy,” which involves using pick-up routines you found on the Internet to get some hot chick who you care nothing about to go home with you, so you can prove what a stud you are. Yeah. These dudes are WINNERS. Really. They are.

So I just sat on the planter for a good 3 hours and listened to the band and basically didn’t give a shit what anyone in the damn bar thought of me. The place was just insanely busy last night, as people stopped by for a beer before heading to the Tigers’ Midnight Madness open practice at 12:01 AM.

The Saucer has a new beer which is pretty good. It’s Abita Pecan Harvest Ale, and it comes in bottles. It’s made with real Louisiana pecans. I guess I like it because it reminds me of when I was growing up and my grandparents had pecan trees in their backyard.

One of the bartenders told me they’re getting Yuengling on draft next summer. That should make “Vitamin Y” fans extremely happy, as I’ve been told that Yuengling on draft is entirely different than (and much better than) Yuengling in a bottle.

About 1 AM I moved into the indoor “nonsmoking” (bullshit) room to catch the last few innings of the Colorado Rockies vs. Some Other Team game with two of my friends who had shown up after the block party. God they were drunk. One of them has a 9 AM Saturday calculus class, and the math teacher in me was about to give him hell for being so drunk just hours before class time, but then he told me it was fall break, so it was all good in the ‘hood.

The waitress at whom I always stick my tongue out had closing shift, and I absolutely tortured her for the last hour. THHHHHPPPPPTTTTTT!!!!! I used to keep a respectful 4-foot-or-so distance when I’d do it, but now I’ll actually get like a foot from her face. Her reaction? She pretended like she hated it, then made an extra 15 or 20 trips past where I was standing so I could do it again. Women are weird. You can behave like a total jackass and they love it and come back for more.

Speaking of waitresses, I have it on good authority that the best Beer Goddess ever to set foot in the Flying Saucer will be back in two weeks. A lot of people thought they’d seen the last of this Goddess, but they were wrong. If you’ve read my blog for any length of time you know who I’m talking about.

My favorite blogger/MILF plans to get a bulldog this winter. She’s going to name it Peyton. She doesn’t even have the dog yet and I already hate it.

I ended last night with a Woodchuck Amber at McGuinness – Doggie Style had been the Fire Sale at the Saucer and I needed something sweet to get that bitter pale ale taste out of my mouth. The place was dead – a couple of Saucer regulars had migrated over there, and there were a bunch of drunk Texas de Brazil employees and that was it. McG has Yuengling now too. We’ll be there for brunch on Sunday, so maybe I’ll have one.

Still leaning toward a trip to Raiford’s tonight, although nothing is set in stone at this point. Considering a trip to Blue Plate Cafe for sausage biscuits right now.

Last night someone gave me details about a possible party tonight, but he didn’t know a whole lot about it so I’m throwing out a request to my readers for more info. He said he had heard there is going to be a King and Queen Condom or Mr. & Mrs. Condom costume party tonight at 8 PM at Earnestine & Hazel’s, and it’s being put on by Planned Parenthood.

Can anyone confirm that this is happening, or provide more info?

Back later with a summary of last night… fun night, for sure.

Here’s a site you might want to bookmark. Longtime readers of my blog know about it already.

RealClearPolitics

RCP offers latest poll data for all upcoming primaries, and they also aggregrate political commentary from both the left and right on a daily basis. Once the nominees are selected they’ll do a red-and-blue map showing which way states are leaning.

Based on their current poll data, it looks like we’re going to have Clinton vs. Giuliani in November 2008. Awesome. I can totally live with that, because either way we’d end up with a competent, qualified, intelligent president in the White House – something we haven’t had in six years.

If those are indeed the nominees, I wonder which way New York will go? NY is usually a state that’s safely in the Democratic column, but Giuliani could swing it the other way. On the other hand, Hillary will probably be able to turn Arkansas blue again, but that will hardly make up for New York which has 5 times the electoral votes.

To quote a bumper sticker: “America – Returning January 20, 2009.” Can’t wait.

That’s what I woke up to. Geez. It’s going to take me all day to catch up.

New Internet term that’s catching on: bacn (pronounced “bacon”). Bacn is mail you want to read, just not right now. It’s different from spam in that it’s not unsolicited – at some point in some way, you agreed for the mail to be sent. Examples of bacn in my Inbox right now: A daily pro wrestling newsletter, a summary of this week’s Memphis Business Journal, newsletters from several organizations around town that send me stuff to include in my blog, a note from TD Ameritrade on new tools to track my IRA, notification from GoDaddy that one of my domain names was automatically renewed.

The term “bacn” will likely make it into next year’s dictionary as an officially recognized word, as “spam” and “phishing” have in the past.

So, today I had lunch with my favorite blogger/MILF at Westy’s. I could tell she wasn’t in the best of moods, dealing with some personal stuff from earlier in the week that she hadn’t totally processed. So our conversation was not all it could have been… although, I agree, it was great to meet her. I think we’re going to be great friends once she gets her current situation handled. Also, her boobs were FANTASTIC. She suggested that next time, we meet at the Saucer or somewhere for beers, and I agreed. Excellent idea.

I had the wild rice dish with cheddar, mushrooms, bacon, and marinated chicken. Next time I think I’ll leave off the chicken. As I ate I was reminded of one of my favorite waitresses who says “cheese and rice” (rather than “J.C.”) when she’s upset. Everything in life relates to my waitresses somehow.

I dumped half the dish in a to-go box and walked the mile home with it. On the way 3 bums asked if they could have my leftovers, and asked for money too – lower than the estimates my favorite blogger/MILF threw out there. She said 6, I said 5.

Took a nap in the early PM, then got dressed and went to EP’s after stopping by the Saucer for one quick beer. Dressed up a little, with button-down shirt, nice jeans and a blazer. Just felt like it – I’m growing my hair out extra long for my Halloween costume once again and I thought the preppie dress would make an interesting counterpoint. There were a lot of people dancing at EP’s but for the most part I hung out in the upstairs watching it all with the bartenders and servers who had been cut. Really I felt like a fish out of water. I saw a lot of people on the dance floor who were big shots at the club and were taking full advantage of it, but who were nobodies (and knew it) anywhere else.

About 1 I got tired of it and started to walk home… hey, there’s McGuinness! So I went in and found one of my favorite Saucer bartenders, who had just got off, and another Saucer regular. Hung out with them for an hour and a half. I had hung out with neither of them previously, and it was very enjoyable to just chill out and have a beer and some good conversation, a 180 from the superficialness I had seen on the dance floor at EP’s earlier on.

Found out that EP’s is having a Halloween party on the 31st. Despite my less-than-perfect experience there tonight (not the club’s or band’s fault by the way, it’s just that the crowd sucked), I believe that one will be worth going to, simply because of the size of the venue (so it won’t get overcrowded) and because it will draw both Downtowners and people from other parts of the city.

New locals’ bar “Hoop’s Bar” to open in approximately 10 days. Details to come.

Also, Computer from Three 6 Mafia is working the turntables Wednesday nights at EP’s.

They’re supposed to come by and change my air filters tomorrow, and I don’t feel like being interrupted so I think I’ll take my laptop to the Second Street branch office to work. Look for me there in the early afternoon.

Drunk. Going to bed.

After almost a year of knowing each other only through e-mail and remarks on each others’ blogs, I’m finally going to meet my favorite blogger/MILF today. She started working Downtown recently and we’re going to meet for lunch. We had planned to meet a couple of times in the past, but in each case she had to cancel. This time, it’s on. Reading her blog the past couple of weeks has been a real education into how the female mind works.

I just read a bulletin of hers on MySpace. Last year she dressed up for Halloween as a sexy witch, but she ended up modifying the costume and became Drunk Girl Doing Jello Shots In Her Underwear. I am SO looking forward to meeting this girl.

Bought the John Lennon glass last night at the Saucer. It’s white with “WAR IS OVER if you want it” in black, which is kind of a boring glass but nevertheless is significant because it’s a replica of the bulletin boards John and Yoko took out around the world in 1969. I sat at the window facing Second Street near the pool table and watched bums, as I tend to do on Monday, Wednesday and Thursday nights. On Tuesdays, I sit in the inside room and hold the rail nearest the door for my trivia team. One of the Saucer employees seems to have figured out my routine, as lately I’ve had the same waitress about 80% of the time, despite her being one of 6 girls on the floor on any given night.

Plans for the weekend:

• Garry Goin and G3 tonight at EP’s. I’ll get there about 11.
• Blessing of the Kegs at the Saucer tomorrow at 5, then a private party from 6 to 10, not sure after that. Possibly back to the Saucer to catch the West Tennessee Wife Swappers.
• Raiford’s on Saturday
• Brunch at McGuinness on Sunday

Florence Henderson, who played Carol Brady aka “Mom” on the TV show The Brady Bunch, will march the Peabody ducks tomorrow afternoon. At 4:45 the hotel’s Duckmaster will present Ms. Henderson with a certificate naming her an Honorary Duckmaster and a Peabody rubber ducky. Then at 5 the two Duckmasters will march the ducks out of the fountain, down a red carpet, into an elevator, and up to the ducks’ cage on the rooftop.

The event is open to the public, and I’m sure the place will be packed, so if you want a good viewing angle, better get there by 4 and save your spot.