Dodgeball, NYE party, soccer tryouts, Thanksgiving dinner and more: Sat update

Dodgeball is coming to Downtown Memphis! On Saturday, November 19, there will be a dodgeball tournament on Peabody Place between Main and Second, with proceeds to benefit the American Cancer Society. Entry fee is $400 for a regular team, $1000 for a corporate team, with 100% of the money raised going to charity.

The Cadre Building presents Exhilaration on New Year’s Eve. Lord T & Eloise, DJ Wick-It The Instigator and DJ Jordan Rogers will perform, along with dance group Priceless.crew. Michael Kelly will emcee. There will be a balloon drop at midnight, two ice luges, and much more. The event benefits the Memphis Songwriters Association. The Cadre is at 149 Monroe at the corner of Second.

Want to play semi-professional soccer? Memphis City FC is holding tryouts at Christian Brothers High School Saturday, November 19. The fee to try out is $40 if you pre-register or $50 if you walk on. You must be at least 16 years of age by the day of the tryout.

Want a delicious Thanksgiving dinner without all the prep work? Let one of Downtown’s best restaurants, LUNCHBOXeats, cook for you! They will sell you an entire Thanksgiving dinner (feeds 6-8; traditional $119, deluxe $189), or you can pick individual entrees, sides, or desserts. Here’s a list. Don’t see what you’re looking for? Give them a call, they may be able to pull it off! Pickup days are Tuesday, November 22, Wednesday, November 23, and (for an additional fee) Thursday, November 24.

Anyone know why they put MAC & CHEESE in all caps when all the other sides are properly cased? Their mac & cheese is pretty good, so I won’t argue. Today I will ask around and see if others agree. I have a feeling I will see one of my readers who is a mac & cheese fan later this morning…

The Voice of Romance, crooner Johnny Mathis, comes to The Orpheum Sunday, June 25, 2017. He’ll perform his favorites and greatest hits. Tickets go on sale Friday, November 18 at 10 AM. (Hey, the 18th is my birthday! I’d prefer a PBR instead of a Johnny Mathis ticket if anyone is buying presents.)

Cafe Pontotoc is hiring. The restaurant, at 314 S. Main, is looking for full-time and part-time servers. Server experience is preferred. Come by between 2 and 4 in the afternoon Tuesday-Friday and fill out an application. No phone calls.

As a computer person I have to nerd out at this news: the unveiling of Code.gov. Last August the Obama Administration signed an order stating that 20 percent of the government’s future software projects to be open source. Code.gov is the place for you to view all the code and there are 50 different projects from 10 different agencies. Thanks, Obama!

Now you can buy pills that cause you to poop glitter. 2016: The year of glitter poop, Pokemon Go, and President Trump. I’d call it the absolute nadir of modern society, but I better not jinx 2017. I tell you one group of people who I bet are mighty excited about the arrival of glitter poop: plumbers.

My least favorite time of the year, Standard Time, begins tonight. At 3AM this morning Daylight Time ends and clocks “fall back” an hour to 2 AM, then there is a second 3 AM an hour later. In case you’re wondering, no the ABC does not let bars stay open until the second 3 AM. However, when clocks “spring forward” in March, they make bars close at 2 AM. So bars don’t gain an hour in the fall and they lose an hour in the spring. Something seems not right there.

They need one of these at the Flying Fish.

Last night I was out at the bars, and I was thinking about the “what’s going on in the city of Memphis” email that Mayor Strickland sends out every week. I thought about his “we intend to be brilliant at the basics” catchphrase and I wondered, would that work as a pickup line? Maybe I’ll go to Silky’s tonight and approach a bachelorette party. “Hey, baby, the ladies tell me I’m brilliant at the basics. Wanna find out?”

Hey, I’ve heard worse.

I found something new in the Halloween candy bowl at work this week: A Butterfinger peanut butter cup. Anyone know if they have those at Maggie Moo’s? I would love to get that mixed in with some ice cream.

I’ve been playing around with electoral maps this week. Here’s a scary one:

electoralmap

McMullin wins Utah, making the electoral vote work out like this: Clinton 268, Trump 264, McMullin 6. No candidate would get the 270 needed for a majority. Given current state polling it is entirely possible this scenario could happen.

The election would be thrown to the incoming House of Representatives, with each state delegation getting one vote. The top three candidates would be required to be on the first ballot. The Republican state delegations outnumber the Democrats, so Trump would seem like a lock for the presidency. However, recognizing the danger Donald Trump represents to the Constitution and America’s reputation in world affairs, Republicans would engage in horse-trading to split their vote between Trump and McMullin. No candidate would get a majority on the first ballot. On the second ballot, the Representatives could nominate whoever they want… leading to the 45th President of the United States, Paul Ryan.

Alternate outcome: The lower 48 vote exactly as the map above, and we all go to bed Tuesday night thinking no candidate gets a majority. Then at 5 AM, the race is called in Alaska, which flips blue for the first time in 52 years… leading to the 45th President of the United States, Hillary Clinton, winning 271 to 261 to 6.

Here’s a throwback photo: On November 5, 2008, we gathered at Calhoun’s Sports Bar (now Max’s) to watch the results of the Obama vs. McCain presidential election.

election2008

This picture was taken right after the election was called for Obama. Most of the people in the bar were pretty happy.

Any bars showing the election results with sound this year? Only place I’ve heard of so far is the High Cotton taproom, and I really don’t want to go east of Danny Thomas. Unless the Midtown Kroger had an election watch party, that’d be the best thing ever…

It’s Farmers Market time! I am ready for breakfast from the tandoori truck. After that I’ll stop by Earnestine & Hazel’s to say hello to Clarence, then over to Max’s to get a good seat for the Arkansas and Memphis games.