Unusual recommendation: Erotic burlesque by a Suicide Siren at The Pony this week

Going to make a very unusual recommendation today. If you want to see something really different, go to The Pony any night tonight through Saturday around 10:00 for a great show.

Now, just to clarify, for those new to my blog, I don’t hang out in strip clubs. I’ve been to strip clubs maybe 4 times in my life, the last time being 14 years ago. Very rarely will you see a mention of strip clubs in this blog. This time, however, is worth an exception.

About 5:20 last night I arrived at the Silly Goose for happy hour. A woman two seats down from me struck up a conversation. She told me that she was a performer, in town for the week from Las Vegas. Given the proximity to the Orpheum, I incorrectly assumed she was with whatever show was happening there.

She told me her name was Chelsea and we quickly bonded, after learning we share eerily similar crazy experiences the past couple of years. Chelsea asked me if the person we had been talking about was a Scorpio. “No, she’s a different sign,” I replied. “But I’m a Scorpio.”

“I’m a Scorpio too,” Chelsea said, and told me her birthday. It was the same as my birthday! We showed each other our IDs.

I noticed Chelsea was covered in beautiful, intricate tattoos, and was starting to suspect the Orpheum was not where she was performing. Now, I hate to be “that guy” in a bar who goes, “So, you have tattoos, huh?” But I felt like I had built up enough rapport, so I said. “I have to ask you something. Two of my good friends follow this performance troupe called The Suicide Girls and are even personal friends with some of them. Are you a Suicide Girl?”

“Well, sort of,” she replied. “I started out as a Suicide Girl. Then three of us branched off and became the Suicide Sirens. I’m the leader of the Suicide Sirens. Normally all three of us perform, but this week I’m solo at The Pony.” She pulled up a video of one of her performances. The Sirens videos are NSFW so I won’t link to them here, but Google “Suicide Sirens” if you’re curious. “Do you want to take a picture so you can text it to your friends?” she asked. So we did.

Chelsea explained that her performances could be described as erotic burlesque, and my Google searches described them as an erotic circus. “I dance on light bulbs, eat fire, hang stuff from my nipples, eat glass, things like that,” she explained. If that sounds like a show you would enjoy seeing, head to The Pony any night of the next four around 10 PM.

“I’ve traveled to 60 cities to perform,” Chelsea told me. “I wish I had kept a diary of my travels, to record that I met people like you in each city. I do like to collect trinkets from the cities I visit.” I told her about one of the unique things about Memphis – BBQ Fest. I told her I’m the director of public relations of a BBQ team. She then met team president Clay, one of the Suicide Girls fans, who had just come in. We arranged to get a Moody Ques 2017 tank top printed and shipped to where she lives, and I gave her my Moody Ques 2017 Colombia-themed rubber wristband (we have extras so I can get another).

Chelsea also took a photo of the reason she struck up a conversation with me, Perjorie T. Roll.

It’s amazing how many cool people I have met by having this little troll stand on the bar. She’s an amazing conversation piece. She is even responsible for adding new people to the BBQ team. I would say that everyone ought to have a troll, but then Perjorie wouldn’t be unique and people wouldn’t ask about her. So never mind, don’t go get a troll.

Chelsea, if you stumble across this blog, it was a pleasure meeting you.

In other, time-sensitive news: The alley party planned for Barboro Alley tonight has been postponed due to the threat of severe weather.

Back tomorrow with more.