So last night I was hanging out at Blind Bear with Butt Slut #1, Butt Slut #2, and Late Night Larry. Butt Slut #2 told me, “When I invented the butt slut thing, I meant for it to be a small thing among a few people. Then you went and blogged it and made it a huge deal. Do you know what you are, Paul?”
And I totally get what she meant to say next.
She meant to refer to me as a founding father of the butt sluts.
The instigator.
The publicist.
But that’s not what she said.
She told me, “It’s like you’re the daddy of the butt sluts.”
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG
WHO’S… YOUR… DADDY?
I have never been so proud of a nickname in my life.
All right. Let’s get on to the news.
I’m so excited I could slap someone: Chris Rock and Dave Chappelle are coming to FedExForum January 23.
In other FedExForum news, The Street Profits vs. the Usos for the tag titles has been announced as the main event of Friday’s WWE Smackdown. Montez F’N Ford baby.
Silly Goose is now doing 2 for $20 wood-fired pizza Thursday from 5 to 8.
And now…
RATING BAR CHAIRS
– Captain’s chair (wraps around your back) 10/10
– Bucket chair with square footrest 7/10
– Bucket chair with round footrest 5/10
– Bar itself does not have a footrest (minus 5)
Grizzlies are at Charlotte tonight at 6. TV is Bally Sports Southeast. Time to grind!
Get your free tickets to Ailey – A Documentary Screening on January 13 at the Halloran Centre.
Today is National Spaghetti Day. Get it at Bardog with Aldo’s Grandma’s New Jersey Balls. Cheers to Mama Aldo, who I’m told still reads this blog every day.
Ja Morant is being sued for allegedly punching a teen.
There’s a sketching class at Bass Pro Saturday from 10 to noon.
All right. Your Big Bad Butt Slut Daddy is signing off for today. Holla if you hear me!