Daily thoughts of a Downtown Memphis resident
Mpact Memphis is looking for audience members for a September 10 debate it is sponsoring for the City of Memphis mayoral race. Major candidates Herman Morris, Carol Chumney, and John Willingham will be there, although so far King Willie has declined to participate.
For more info on the debate and how to apply to be an audience member, check out this article in today’s Commercial Appeal.
A member of The Subteens lives in my building and posted this on the bulletin board, so I figured I’d pass along the info. The Subteens and DJ Piper Dandy tonight at the Gibson Lounge, $10 cover, prom attire requested but optional.
Several readers have e-mailed me asking the identity of my favorite blogger/MILF who I mention from time to time. Now, usually when I mention other bloggers I link to their blogs… but in this case I don’t. Why? Well, I still haven’t met my favorite blogger/MILF in person yet, and in case she turns out to be hot I don’t want to go introducing her to several hundred of my male blog readers.
But, OK, I’ll give into public demand and post a pic of her. But I’ll do even better than posting a current pic of her…. here’s an age-enhanced pic of how she’ll look in the year 2057.
Thursday when I gave my speech about panhandling to the Center City Commission, I mentioned Sharp Dressed Bum, whose real name is Tommie, in an illustrative example. Tommie is a well-known Downtown panhandler who cusses people out, makes obscene and lewd comments, and makes threatening physical gestures when people turn him down. One of my readers saw the post and e-mailed me the following story about him:
“I’m almost ashamed to admit, but Tommie was my “tour guide” to the
Rendezvous. I gave him $10 for taking me there, and he argued with me to
give him $20. I lectured him on how grateful he should be to get even $10,
and he stomped away.He flirted with my wife and tried to hold both of our hands. Good grief.
Anything to gain your confidence.It was obvious Tommie was telling so many lies he forgot which ones he told.
One, he told me was going to meet his girlfriend. Then he told me he didn’t
have a girlfriend. Two, he told me he worked at Rendezvous. Then he told
me worked elsewhere. Three, he told me he was a tourist and needed money to
stay at the Holiday Inn. Wait, I thought he worked at the Rendezvous.
Never mind. You get the picture.”
By the way, next Thursday, August 30 is Tommie’s 47th birthday. How do I know this? Well, about a month ago I found him in shelbywarrants.org with an outstanding warrant, and learned his full name and date of birth. Except, I checked yesterday and the warrant is no longer in the system, which may explain why Tommie hasn’t been seen on the streets in the past week – he’s possibly enjoying a stay at Hotel 201 right now. Anyway, if he’s out by the 30th and you see him, be sure to wish him a happy birthday.
Last night I was in the Flying Saucer and I saw this flyer on the bar:
Personally, I’d rather fantasize about the waitresses, but, whatever floats your boat.
No, actually, I do think it’s pretty cool that they’re starting a fantasy football league at the Saucer. I probably won’t participate since I don’t follow the NFL close enough to know which players to draft.
Oh crap… I just realized that this promotion will draw even more GUYS to my favorite bar… like the Saucer isn’t enough of a sausage-fest already. Why can’t they run some promotions to get women to come there?
If you don’t get out to the Saucer enough to join their fantasy football league, it’s easy to find another league and play online – here’s a link to Yahoo’s fantasy league, just click the image to sign up.
Today I attended the Center City Commission Board of Directors meeting and gave a 5-minute presentation as a “Downtown Stakeholder,” designed to give the board a reality check on what goes on down here. It was a very unique opportunity and I appreciated the invitation. I think the speech was well received and I saw looks of surprise on some of the attendees’ faces when I told them stories of the aggressive, intimidating panhandling that I see every day.
I also learned of a couple of opportunities for Downtowners, one to interact with the CCC yourselves, and another to support a measure to get panhandling cases moved to a special environmental court. More details on those coming soon.
I’ve pasted the approximate text of my speech below. Whew! Glad that’s over. I actually had to put on a dress shirt and nice slacks (no tie, though) on a 100-degree day – not fun, how do people do that every day? I’ve decided to torture myself and keep it on for the rest of the day, too. Luckily, the work I have to do this afternoon is mostly busy work (copy, paste, save, upload) so I’m done thinking for a while. So I’ve decided to visit my waitresses this afternoon and work from the Saucer.
Don’t forget, Crash Kole CD release party at Pearl’s Oyster House tonight, 7:30.
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First of all, I want to thank you all for having me here today. My name is Paul Ryburn, and I’ve been a Downtown resident for five and a half years. I’m also lucky enough to be able to work wherever there’s wireless Internet, so I’m out and about a lot, working from restaurants and coffee shops down here. And I have to tell you, based on what I’ve seen, panhandling in Downtown Memphis has never been worse than it is right now, both in terms of the numbers of panhandlers, and their aggressive, intimidating nature. I want to tell you a few quick stories to illustrate.
A few Sundays ago, I was walking up Beale Street between Second and Main. This is a block that’s open to vehicle traffic, with the Elvis statue right there. There were three panhandlers who had taken over this block and were running it like their own private business. One was working the statue itself, chasing down tourists who had come to take a picture and aggressively hitting them up for money. Another was literally stopping moving traffic on Beale, walking up to car windows and panhandling right there. A third was illegally charging to park, both at the metered spaces on Beale – which are free on Sunday – and in the Premier Systems Parking lot at Main and Beale, which was unattended that day. No one was stopping these guys, they had total control of the street. And this was not an isolated incident, either. This kind of thing goes on all the time on that block.
Let me tell you about a particular panhandler down here, named Tommie [note: that’s Sharp Dressed Bum’s real name]. He likes to hang out by the Peabody, the Rendezvous, Second Street, Peabody Place, where there are a lot of tourists. He’ll approach them and act like a “tour guide” – except, at the end of the tour, “gimme some money.” And if you say no, Tommie gets nasty. He’ll follow you down the street and cuss you out. If you’re a woman he’ll make obscene sexual comments. Sometimes he’ll even do this (quick threatening motion) like he’s going to jump you. Very intimidating, and it makes a horrible impression of Downtown Memphis.
CeCe’s Liquors at Main and Madison sells one-shot bottles of cheap booze, and $2-3 bottles of cheap wine. As a result, panhandlers hang out nearby in Court Square, and also in front of the Walgreens at Main and Madison. They’ll beg passersby, saying they’re homeless and need money to get something to eat. What they actually do, though, is gather up enough money and walk over to CeCe’s to buy a bottle. They drink it and then repeat the process, going back out to beg some more… except this time, they’re drunk.
That last story illustrates a point I want to make. Many of these guys you see out here begging month after month, year after year are not homeless. This is a business for them, they’re out here hustling. They make good money and have places to go at night. But what it does do is take money away from legitimate organizations who have programs in place to help those in need.
Not only that, but it takes money away from businesses Downtown. How do I know that? Well, I write a blog about my life in Downtown Memphis. It’s pretty popular, getting about 700 hits a day on weekdays. As a result, people send me e-mail – people from out of town, and from other parts of Memphis. They say things like, “Hey Paul, I visited your neighborhood last weekend. I agree with you, there’s tons of stuff to do Downtown, but every time I went out on the sidewalks these people approached me for money. It was very scary. I’ll be honest, I’m not going to come back.” I’ve also had friends who considered buying condos down here, then changed their minds. They told me, “I don’t want to deal with that [panhandling] every time I walk out my front door.”
Now, there is a group of citizens that is trying to turn the problem around. About a month ago my friend Mike King and I formed Handling-Panhandling, an online Internet forum where citizens discuss the problem. We’ve posted pictures of panhandlers, and in many cases identified them by name and whether they have outstanding warrants. We’ve also identified the hotspot locations Downtown. When we created the forum we expected it to have a limited appeal; we expected about 30-40 members to join. We were wrong. After only a month in existence, we’ve had almost 200 people sign up, many with messages to the effect of, “I’m fed up. If something isn’t done about this, I’m out of here.”
There has been progress. The Memphis Police now monitor the forum, and we’ve seen them applying manpower to the problem hotspots we’ve identified. However, this can’t be a quick fix, where we see cops for a couple of weeks and then things return to business as usual. We need a long-term solution. We need a plan.
In conclusion: I live Downtown. I absolutely love my neighborhood and wouldn’t want to live anywhere else. I want to see it grow and prosper. When people visit my neighborhood, I want them to leave with a great impression. That’s not happening right now due to the panhandling. Thanks again for your time.
Found a new online store today called Prank Place with a huge selection of hilarious T-Shirts. Check them out. These were probably my two favorites:
Click the link above to check them out. Hundreds more where these came from. Browse their entire inventory and you’re just about guaranteed to find something to offend every person you know.
I’ve been invited to give a 5-minute presentation at the Center City Commission’s board meeting this Thursday. The Center City Commission is the organization that plans and oversees growth Downtown, and every month they schedule time for a few “Downtown Stakeholders” to speak frankly to the board about whatever is on their mind. This is important because many of the board members themselves do not live Downtown, and so the stakeholders act as their eyes and ears in a sense.
So, this month I’m an invited stakeholder. I get a free lunch out of the deal, and although I can speak about any subject I want, you better believe I have a topic in mind: panhandling. In 5 minutes I hope to stress to the board members, as well as representatives of both mayors’ offices who will be there, how out of control panhandling (especially aggressive, illegal panhandling) has become.
I’ve been rehearsing my speech, and I have a good feeling about it – I’m getting that “YEAH! I nailed it!” feeling I got when I was a teacher and gave a really good lecture. These are the points I plan to cover:
I’ve rehearsed the speech and have it pretty well down, although I hope to run it by my forum co-moderator Mike King before Thursday. It’s a lot of material but I’ve got it down to about 5 minutes and 20 seconds (hopefully they won’t have the stopwatch on and cut me off right at 5).
Looking forward to it… maybe after I give the speech Thursday I’ll post the complete text of it here. I’ve practiced it so many times that I’ve just about got it down word for word.
Looks like the Peabody’s Corner Bar at Second and Union is going to be the place to be after work from now on. They are now offering a complimentary hors d’ouevres bar, with food prepared by Chef Brian Barrow from Capriccio Grill, “on the house” with the purchase of an alcoholic beverage. Food selections include ravioli, fried calamari, chicken Parmesan strips, meatballs and imported cheeses. Monday through Friday, 5:30 to 7:00 PM. Yum!!! Looks like The Corner Bar just went straight to the top of my happy hour list.