Paul Ryburn's Journal

Street-People.com has a great story posted about the bums who camp out in Confederate Park. This story explains why some of Downtown’s bums are constantly going around saying they’re hungry and begging for something to eat – because smoking pot gave them the munchies. Click here for the full story.

Apparently I’m not the only one who’s tired of smokers’ obnoxious behavior of throwing their cigarette butts wherever they damn well please. Check out this rant.

Dammit… just got back from lunch, pulled up my favorite blogger/MILF’s blog, and found that she was looking for someone to go to lunch with. Shoulda e-mailed her, but, too late now. I had the Singapore Fried Rice from China Restaurant on Jefferson again.

My favorite blogger/MILF wrote about a topic of great interest today… she says it’s freezing in her office today, and she’s wearing a bra without much padding. “Yeah the boobs were on high alert,” she wrote. If she keeps writing quality stuff like this, I may vote her her as best blogger next year in the Flyer’s poll. A word of advice to her: PICTURES would definitely help make great posts like today’s even better.

So, I went to the Flyer’s party last night and it was AMAZING. The event was catered by many of the winners in the Best Restaurant categories and was absolutely out of this world. One of the biggest hits food-wise was the fried pickles from two-time Reader’s Choice winner for Best Restaurant, Big Foot Lodge. And the beer on tap: Stella Artois and Blue Moon! Oh and Coors Light, but who in their right mind would pick Coors Light over Stella and Blue Moon? I guess they had to have a keg of Coors Light to keep the party guests who live in Cordova, Germantown, and Collierville happy.

I was unsuccessful in using my blog to get a date for this year’s party though… ended up going with my friend Mikey. Oh well, if I didn’t get to enjoy the company of a hot babe this year, at least I got to enjoy the company of one of my good friends. Found out that Saturday night’s incident at the Westin – where 200 people on the Gibson rooftop watched a couple having sex in one of the Westin’s rooms – not only made the news on Karson & Kennedy’s radio show, but also Michael Donahue’s society column in the CA as well. Man oh man… bet those people will never show their faces in Memphis again.

Got another VIP party to go to tonight… can’t reveal where, because it needs to be kept a secret, but I will say that dancing will be involved, and that I’ll be consuming a very famous signature drink at a location somewhere Downtown. I RSVP’d for myself and a guest, so I guess I have about six hours to find myself a date. I’m not bringing Mikey again. If any hot babes are reading this and want to go to the most awesome party happening in the city tonight, shoot me an e-mail.

You know, I just realized why I’m never able to find dates: I hang out in a bar almost every day of the week whose clientele tends to be about 80% guys. Yeah, that could be part of the problem. Not that it will stop me from heading up there to get a beer as soon as I publish this post.

Speaking of that bar: After the Flyer party last night, I hit the Saucer about 10:30 and it looks like they’re finally sticking to their guns about keeping the inner room nonsmoking. The air in there was clear, and if anyone did manage to sneak a smoke in the inner room, they didn’t appear to be doing it with management’s blessing. Good for the Saucer.

I also got an e-mail from the management of the Majestic, assuring me that their smoking policy will be followed to the letter (it’s now all nonsmoking except the patio), so I’ll be able to enjoy my Sunday brunch there without breathing nasty, filthy smoke.

Coming tomorrow:
– Pictures of the party I’m attending tonight
– A tribute to a sensationally bad waitress (already have this one typed – it’s one of the longest rants I’ve done in a while)
– I’m sure that I’ll probably have something to say about the election
– Since the Saucer is playing by the rules regarding smoking, I’ll have more information about the Blessing of the Kegs, to happen tomorrow during Happy Hour.

Time for a beer!

Recently I received an issue of the Downtown Neighborhood Association newsletter. On the front page was an editorial by the association’s president, saying that this is an extremely important election for mayor, and to please keep in mind which candidate will do the most for Downtown. “As Downtown goes, so goes the rest of the city,” the editorial read.

No names were mentioned, but to me it seemed like a suggestion to vote for Mayor Herenton. I’ll admit that in the past, Willie has played a big role in Downtown’s revitalization. In 2003, I was happy to vote for him.

But not so in 2007. Crime is out of control all over the city. Memphis recently ranked #1 in a list of cities with the highest number of violent crimes per capita. I have friends in other parts of the city – Cooper-Young, Chickasaw Gardens – who have been the victims of home invasions. The U of M recently mourned as one of its football players was shot to death at Central and Zach Curlin. Carjackings occur all over the city. Now, it’s true that Downtown is still the safest neighborhood in Memphis – but that crime wave will eventually find its way down here as well. It actually did in 2006 – several people I know where knocked out from behind and robbed. Things are a little better this year, but that’s certainly no thanks to Mayor Herenton, who spent most of last year training for a celebrity boxing match.

Even in Downtown itself, there are signs that Willie isn’t doing a good job. Cafe Francisco had to close because of the uncertain nature of the Pinch neighborhood over the past three years. Why is the Pinch in limbo? Because Herenton is either unable or unwilling to get something done regarding future plans for the Pyramid.

Panhandlers have free run all over Downtown. They harass passersby in Court Square, on the Main Street Mall, in parking lots near Beale Street. It would be an easy problem to clean up – all we need is for cops to get out of their cars and walk around. That would happen if Director Godwin ordered his officers to do just that. Which would happen if Godwin’s boss the mayor requested it. But there has been no such request. Herman Morris has said he will order the officers to get out of their cars and interface with the community to a much greater extent.

Herenton’s behavior has also been embarrassing and downright racist. He called his opponent Morris “boy” and suggested that African-Americans who don’t vote to re-elect the mayor are “house Negroes.” That kind of talk is completely unacceptable in 2007, no matter whether the person saying it is black or white. It perpetuates the racial divide in the city, sets the wrong example for our youth, and makes Memphis look horrible to outsiders looking in.

For the good of Downtown and all the city, it’s time for Willie to go. Either of his major opponents, Herman Morris or Carol Chumney, would make an excellent choice for mayor. I personally prefer Morris because of his leadership during “Hurricane Elvis,” his quiet but effective manner, and his ability to build consensus. But whether it’s Morris or Chumney, I hope the city wakes up in the morning to learn that the votes have been counted and a new era is upon us.

Blogging from the Second Street branch office, having just picked up and read through the Memphis Flyer’s “Best Of” issue. About two weeks ago, I received an e-mail from the Flyer informing me that my blog had placed in the “Best Of” category, and that I was invited to their yearly party. I assumed that meant that, like last year, there was no clear winner, and my blog was granted “Reader’s Choice” status as one of the top 5 vote getters.

I was wrong. This year there was a clear winner.

AND IT WAS ME!!!! I was stunned. Again, thank you, thank you, thank you to all my readers who voted for this blog. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. You can look forward to more drunk posts, photos of bums, Tube Top Month, and other, similar posts in the year to come.

Other notes from this week’s Flyer:

– The “Best place to meet singles” category is the most depressing thing I’ve ever seen. The top 3 vote-getters:

1. Church
2. Online
3. Beale Street

As a single guy living in Memphis, that makes me want to move to another city.

– The cover features a hand holding a Best of Memphis 2007 trophy… that hand belongs to none other than Flying Saucer bartender AMANDA. She’s famous! Who knows, maybe she’ll leave the Saucer and pursue a new career as a hand model.

– There’s an ad in the Flyer that says Court Square Center (the old Lincoln-American Tower) will be ready for move-in by the end of 2007, and they are now leasing apartments. More info:
http://www.courtsquarecenter.com/

– Best Memphis Failure: First place, Mayor Willie Herenton. Well, they sure got that one right. Be sure to check out Bruce VanWyngarden’s editorial about the election on page 3, it’s really good.

That’s all for now… maybe I’ll do the Mayor Herenton post later this afternoon, but no guarantees.

– Devon Allman’s Honeytribe will be the entertainment for tonight’s edition of “Bands, Beer and Bums” in Court Square. I’m going to have to miss this one due to the Memphis Flyer party, but it’s a perfect evening for a concert in the park, so come on out. Enjoy the beautiful weather, great music and a brewski as you get hit up time and time again for ’bout fitty cent.

– Speaking of bums and Court Square… Wendy’s will be at Court Square Wednesday, October 17 from 10 AM to 3 PM, giving away free burgers as part of its “Great Taste Tour” that they’re promoting nationally. You know every bum in the city is going to turn out for that one. They’re giving away burgers to non-bums too, so put that one on your calendar for lunch if you work Downtown.

– If you missed the Bravo season opener last month at the Power House, you still have a chance to join and get in on some pre-season savings. Bravo is the 21-to-40-something group that provides its members experiences in the arts (gallery shows, opera, theatre, ballet, etc.) and also offers its members a chance to network, with free food, beer, and wine, immediately prior to each event. Their first event is tomorrow night, Thursday, October 4, at the Metal Museum, where members will get to tour the brand-new Julius Blum library, a $1.5 million extension to the museum. It holds the largest collection of decorative metalworking portfolios, slides, and books in the country.

If you’re interested in joining Bravo for the 2007-08 season, they’ve extended their special pre-season subscription discount through today – $80 single, $125 couple. Note that you have to join TODAY to get the discount – if you want until tomorrow and show up at the Metal Museum and attempt to join then, it looks like you’ll be paying full price. For more information on joining Bravo, click here.

– My blog post about the Blues Ball, and how everyone on the Gibson roof was watching a couple having sex in a room at the Westin, made the airwaves this morning… Kennedy from Q107.5 used it in her morning entertainment report. Actually, the credit should go not to me, but my favorite blogger/MILF, who attended Blues Ball. I stole the story about the couple from her blog.

– Yesterday I was eating lunch at Bon Ton Cafe on Monroe, and I saw a poster in the window for one of the most unusual events I’ve heard about Downtown in a while: Opera Memphis’ Princess Turandot presents Lord T and Eloise: Aristocrunk at the Opera, Saturday, October 13 at the Orpheum. I can’t even begin to imagine what’s going to take place at that show. Here’s a flyer with more details (click for a larger sized image):

– If you’ve ever driven down Adams Avenue and admired the beautiful 19th century Victorian mansions, then you should consider attending the Victorian Village Home Tour, this Sunday, October 7, from 1 to 5 PM. $10 admission, free food, strolling musicians. Here’s a list of homes on the tour and info about advance tickets.

– Legendary band leader Doc Severinsen joins the Memphis Symphony Orchestra for a show Saturday, October 20. Severinsen was the leader of the house band on the Tonight Show during the Johnny Carson years. For more info check the Memphis Symphony website.

– One of my readers e-mailed this morning with a suggestion for a post: List of restaurants/bars Downtown that have gone 21 and up all the time in order to allow smoking. That’s a great idea – I’ll start compiling a list. That would be useful information for smokers and nonsmokers alike.

I do know that Swig has switched to 21 and up, which makes a lot of sense – why would a kid be in a martini bar anyway? I’m also pleased to learn that both of my Sunday brunch bars – Majestic and McGuinness – have gone non-smoking in order to remain family-friendly. HOWEVER: If they bend the rules the way the Flying Saucer has done, they’re going to get the same public spanking right here in my blog that the Saucer got twice in the past 24 hours.

– Outta here for now. Coming this afternoon, if I have time: One more post about the mayoral race.

This morning I woke up and realized that one of my posts this week is a perfect illustration of a point I made in another. On Monday I posted about why I hate smoking so much – it’s not that it’s a nasty habit or an unhealthy habit, but that it’s an obnoxious habit. Smokers tend to have a total lack of consideration for anyone else in the world where their habit is concerned.

Well, last night I made a post about the Flying Saucer’s enforcement of its smoking policy, and this morning I realized how perfectly it illustrates that smoking is obnoxious. In case you missed that post: The Saucer went 21 and up on Monday, which under the new law grants them the right to let patrons continue to smoke. In an attempt to appeal to nonsmokers as well, they declared that the indoor room would be nonsmoking all the time, and the outdoor room (the Garden) would be the smoking section.

But, in reality, here’s what really happened. Regulars, people known to consistently come in and spend money, would sit at the bar in the nonsmoking indoor room and say, “Gotta go smoke… sure wish I could still do it here.” And the bartender, manager or waitress would say, “Weeellll… this is the non-smoking room… but we like you, so…. shhhhh… here you go….” and then push an ashtray their way. By 9:00 there must have been 20 people in the inner room holding cigarettes. The air was as smoky in there as it was back in June, before any kind of smoking rules were in place.

It’s incredibly obnoxious that smokers can’t be troubled to walk 20 feet into the other room to indulge in their habit. Once again, their attitude is, they should be able to do whatever they want wherever they want, and the rest of the world will just have to deal with it.

I wouldn’t have a problem with the Saucer’s smoking policy if they did either of the following:

1) Scrap the non-smoking section altogether, and turn the entire bar (both rooms) into all-smoking, all-the-time; or

2) Keep the indoor room non-smoking, but start enforcing it on EVERYONE, including regulars, including VIPs, including Saucer employees who have gotten off work, including employees of other bars who come in there for a drink after work. EVERYONE.

But the de facto policy in place now – saying they have a nonsmoking room, when it’s actually full of smokers – is just a complete joke.

Coverage of their Oktoberfest events in this blog is hereby SUSPENDED for as long as they claim to have a nonsmoking room and I still see smokers in it. I won’t go back and take down old posts, but there will be no new ones, including no pictures of this Friday’s blessing of the kegs.

All right. Rant over for now. In other news, the Rapscallions, despite an extremely strong third round, came one point shy of the win at trivia last night. So we added $25 to our gift-certificate stash, bringing the total to $195, with about a month and a half before the oldest certificate expires.

Back later this morning with a “Wednesday update” post with info about events going on Downtown.

I’ve been promising an announcement to come today on this blog. Well, today is here, so here goes… Be sure to pick up a copy of the Memphis Flyer today for their 2007 annual “Best of Memphis” issue. For the second year in a row, my blog placed in the “Best Blog” category. THANK YOU to all who voted for me! I really do appreciate it.

The big party I’m going to tonight is the Flyer’s annual “Best of Memphis” party. I’ll bring the digicam and get some pics. I’ve been to this party twice before (2003 and 2006) and it’s always loads of fun.

Thanks for all your support over the past 12 months, and I hope to keep posting interesting and relevant stuff in the year to come. I truly enjoy it every time I meet one of my readers.

When the new smoking law took effect 10/1, the Flying Saucer went 21 and up. The plan, I was told, was for the indoor room to be nonsmoking all the time. The outdoor room (The Garden) was to be smoking-allowed, which they can do because no one under 21 (customers or employees) is allowed inside.

Well, tonight I went to the Saucer and it was clear that those rules were only there for appearances’ sake. The real rules are, if you spend a significant amount of money in this bar, you can do whatever the hell you want. Inside or outside. During the past three months, if you wanted to smoke, you had to at least wait til 8 or go to the Garden. But tonight, the inner room – supposedly the nonsmoking room – was smokier than I had seen it in a while, even at 6:30, with regulars feeling free to light up at will. But, wait, it’s legal. Since all the people in the Saucer – employees and customers – were over 21, management was technically free to let people do whatever they want, so no laws were violated.

I’ve had a couple of people e-mail me, asking why I still support the Saucer, saying that I’m supporting a bar that has been allowed to flout the smoking law via a loophole. I dismissed their e-mails at first, thinking them to be a bit extreme. But after what I saw tonight, I may yet come around to my e-mail correspondents’ point of view. The inner room needs to be all nonsmoking, all the time, no matter who you are. NO EXCEPTIONS.

An anonymous source sent me some info and pics about Raiford’s, which will have its public grand re-opening Friday night. Raiford, Paula and the entire staff will be back. They will be driving the Caddies around Downtown Friday and making a grand entrance. (By the way – the usual rule, which is to get to Raiford’s late, around 1 or even 2, does not apply Friday night – be there at 10 or you’ll likely be standing in a long, long line.) They are working on getting Vance closed between Main and Mulberry Friday and Saturday nights, because it will be such a huge celebration. I was sent some pics of the remodeling, much of which is being done by the man himself, as you can see below. I’ve been told the inside looks quite authentic, but they have also made improvements over the old setup where needed (bathrooms).

Good thing I didn’t throw away my disco party clothes when Raiford’s closed back in May. Looks like my Disco Paul persona will make a return this weekend. I’ll probably make a stop by the Saucer on the way there and freak out all the frat boys and meatheads who take that place over on Friday nights. Guess it’s time to break out the platform shoes and make sure they’re in good working order.