Paul Ryburn's Journal

I just learned that RAIFORD’S will hold Halloween costume contests both Friday and Saturday, October 26 and 27.

Oh. It’s. On. Like. Neckbone.

Raiford’s daughter Paula does an excellent job serving up the 40s, but you know, the Disco may find itself with an extra waitress one of those nights. If you know what I mean.

If you’ve ever driven through the North Parkway – Danny Thomas – Jackson/Auction intersection and tried to make a turn, you know what a total clustermess it is. The city is finally doing something about it. This weekend they will close the intersection and realign the streets. Coming from the east, North Parkway will now feed into Auction, and Jackson will feed into Mill. North Parkway west of Danny Thomas will be closed as part of the St. Jude expansion.

Check this article in the CA for more info.

Wonder if that’ll turn Mill into a major thoroughfare through Uptown.

Fox 13 ran a story about Sunday night’s Downtown crowbar beating incident. Here’s a link. The report says that Roy Dunbar aka “Flower Man” will be charged with aggravated robbery rather than attempted murder, because the robbery charge carries stiffer penalties. Fine. I don’t care what you charge him with. Just get him off the streets for a long, long time. PLEASE.

Eyewitness News has a story about the attack as well. They report that Dunbar is a career criminal who has been in and out of jail on charges of burglary, breaking into cars, and assault.

Yesterday I also heard about another bum who branched out into activities a lot more illegal and dangerous than panhandling. Wednesday night this guy was apparently mad at the world and decided to express himself by throwing bricks at cars. The police were called and he was hauled off to jail. Good riddance, yet again.

Recap of the day yesterday: Had some website updates to do. Got most of them done, then decided about 3:30 to go hang out at the Saucer for a couple of hours. Which really meant, I decided to go hang out at the Saucer for five hours. Came home, tried to resume my work, but my Internet connection was having problems. I’ve heard I’m not the only Downtowner who has had problems with Comcast this week. So after a while I gave up and went back out, first to McGuinness and then EP’s. Got my second wind at EP’s and totally could have closed the place down, but a little after 1 I got a weird vibe from someone I thought was a friend, and decided the best thing to do was to just leave.

Computer: Good meeting you last night, and please send me details about your Wednesday night gig, will be happy to help get the word out.

I’ll also post details about EP’s Halloween party soon – just gotta download the pic from my camera.

Speaking of Halloween – this is how the Halloween parties Downtown are looking so far:

Friday the 26th: My apartment building’s party. Sorry, this is a private party. Although, exceptions can be made if you’re female and hot. Atlas (inside Jillian’s) has their party on the 26th as well.

Saturday the 27th: Flying Saucer, and last I heard McGuinness was leaning toward having their party on this date. That would be good because they’re right across the street from each other.

Wednesday the 31st: EP’s. Usually Big Foot does their party on the 31st, although I don’t have official confirmation on this.

Any other parties to add to the list? Is 450 Stonewall happening this year? Their website hasn’t been updated since 2006. Even so, their site is worth visiting to browse all the pics of hot babes from previous years.

Plans for today: Continue the project I couldn’t get done last night, now that Internet is working again. Mid-afternoon I’ll head to the Saucer, where a Trappist monk brought in all the way from Belgium will bless the kegs at 5:30. Okay, he’s not really a Trappist monk, but if you drink enough you won’t know the difference. Later in the evening I plan on going to my happy place – Raiford’s. In fact, I may go to my happy place BOTH nights this weekend. Drinking a 40 and acting a fool sounds like just what the doctor ordered for Professor Paul right about now. I didn’t make it there last weekend, so tonight I’ll probably debut the new, improved gold disco outfit.

The good thing about the blessing of the kegs is that it happens at the bar, which means I’ll likely sit at the bar, and not be tempted to sit at the outside window for hours and hours and get drunk and play The Window Game. Yesterday’s results, with the game taking place from 3:40 to 8:30: 24 bums, 20 police cars, 7 cars making left turns out of the center lane. One car turned left out of the RIGHT lane, and I didn’t even have a category for that so I counted it as two out of the center lane. Watched Estes and Sherry panhandle on Second for a while. Sherry is the pregnant female bum, and Estes is her boyfriend or husband or whatever.

DAMN IT!!! I just checked the weather, and for the third year in a row the weather looks lousy for Halloween party weekend. Lows of 49 both Friday and Saturday. Warm weather is definitely preferable for Halloween, because it’s more conducive for females to wear skimpy, slutty costumes.

My favorite blogger/MILF is invited to my building’s Halloween party if she’ll dress up as Drunk Girl Doing Jello Shots In Her Underwear again.

All right, time to wrap this up and get some work done. Looking forward to a great weekend.

I’ve been told that one of the crowbar attack victims will be interviewed on Fox 13’s news at 5, and the other will be on Channel 3’s news at 10.

My apologies to my friends at Fox 13 for not getting back with you today – I had a high-priority project come up today and couldn’t afford the time away from the computer.

Just took my noontime walk around Downtown, and I ran into “That Downtown Guy,” Lee Warren, who does the Definitely Downtown TV show (I actually like to think of him as “That Other Downtown Guy”). He asked me to stick around a minute, and he went and got his cameraman and he shot a promo of me saying, “I’m Paul Ryburn, and this is Definitely Downtown.” He said it will air on a future show.

The show has been off the air for a while, but it makes its return on Sunday, October 28 at 11:05 PM, on a new station – ABC 24. Be sure to tune in, or if you don’t stay away that week, set your DVR or VCR.

One of my readers contacted me with some news about the crowbar attack that happened Sunday night. For those of you who didn’t catch my previous post, a couple was attacked at Main and Monroe about 11:15 PM Sunday night. The attacker hit them over the head with a crowbar, and was chased away by a courtesy guard from a nearby building. The guard used the pictures on the Handling-Panhandling online forum to ID the attacker as “Flower Man,” a well-known panhandler. The police found Flower Man Monday and hauled him in.

So here’s the update: I had previously reported that the victims were tourists. Turns out that’s not the case. They were service industry workers, both of whom work at popular restaurants on Second Street. The attacker hit the female first. She hit the ground, then took off running, then collapsed at Main and Monroe. The attacker then hit the male.

Both of them are in the hospital and have staples in their scalps. They consider themselves lucky to be alive. As is usually the case with service industry workers, neither of them had health insurance.

Flower Man is being charged with attempted murder, so we likely won’t see him again for a long, long time. Again, GOOD RIDDANCE.

Got a favor to ask of you… if you know any restaurant/bar employees and/or managers in the Downtown area, please make sure they know about this. A lot of service industry people get off work and go out for drinks in their work uniforms. Since servers and bartenders usually get paid daily in cash tips, they’re walking targets with their work clothes on. They need to be extra careful after work and bring a change of clothes as possible. Also, more restaurants need to set up a system like the one at The Majestic Grille where employees don’t leave with a large amount of cash.

Another reader has e-mailed me a couple of times, asking why this story hasn’t been reported by the media. Yeah, that’s a good question, WHERE IS THE MEDIA??? Even if they didn’t know about it on their own, I know a lot of them read this blog… you’d think some of them would’ve followed up with the police, got the details, and reported it. So far Fox 13 is the only media outlet to contact me about this. The crowbar attack certainly seems as newsworthy as any of the crap on page one of today’s Commercial Appeal.

Since I mentioned that the victims work at bars on Second Street, and everyone knows I hang out at the Flying Saucer on Second, I want to let everyone know that the victims were not employees of the Saucer. THANK GOD. I would be devastated if any of those girls were attacked.

This incident also illustrates that not all the panhandlers working Downtown’s streets are harmless. Some of them will turn to more serious illegal activity if bumming is not profitable enough. Thankfully Flower Man is off the streets for good, but I know for a fact that at least two other Downtown panhandlers (Willie who works Court Square, and Sharp Dressed Bum) have felony convictions on their record. If you take out money in response to a panhandler’s request, you may be literally taking your life into your own hands.

One final note: Even though this incident happened near where I live, I still love Downtown, have no plans to move, and see Downtown as my home for years and years in the future. The benefits of being down here – the sense of community, the ability to walk everywhere, the entertainment options – far outweigh the negatives.

Sorry to be such a downer on a Thursday morning but this information needs to be made public.

Legal stuff: Flower Man is presumed innocent until found guilty in a court of law

I went to Court Square today for lunch, where Wendy’s was giving out free burgers for its Great Taste Tour. As I predicted, they didn’t know what they were getting themselves into – every bum, vagrant, homeless person and pigeon in town showed up. I ran down there about 10:45, right after the event started, and there were already 100 people in line, most of whom appeared to be either homeless or bums.

Each person in line got their choice of a Wendy’s Single or the new Baconator. I ran home and e-mailed a friend who thinks the Baconator is the best thing ever… he works in East Bumblefuck and there’s no way he would’ve been able to get Downtown to get one in the middle of the day, so I just had to rub it in a little.

Went back up there about 12:30, got in line, still 100 people long but by that time only 50% bums. It took 15 minutes to make it to the front. The guy behind me asked if they were giving away free beer with the free burgers. The guy behind him kept shouting “I WANT THAT BURGENATOR! I WANT THAT BURGENATOR!” the entire time. You can’t buy comedy like that. I should’ve brought a video camera.

They were also handing out gift cards for people who didn’t have time to stand in the long line. I was going to see if I could get one for my friend, but they came by and stamped my hand while I was waiting.

I finally got to the front of the line and they handed me a Baconator and a Coke Zero. I’ve got to hand it to the Wendy’s people, they were VERY efficient and they were not phased at all by the bums. I stayed for a few minutes to watch legendary street person Willie N. annoy people and to watch one of the finest examples of pigeonhood ever seen in Memphis peck at a slice of pepperoni pizza, then went home and ate.

Some pictures of the event:

My Internet connection was somewhat spotty at home, so darn it, I had to pack up my laptop and take it someplace with a more dependable connection. And beer. And waitresses. Gotta keep workin’ you know. Attempting to sit at my favorite window seat without my laptop getting rained on. Not sure how well this is going to work.

But, I like sitting at the window because then I can play The Window Game. Every day we sit in the window and count how many of certain things we see on Second Street. The categories:

Bums
Police cars
Cars that turn the wrong way onto one-way Second Street
Hooptys
Appearances by homeless person Scratchy
Cars making a left turn that aren’t in the left lane
FUMOT (F’d up modes of transportation)

Looks like I may not be going to Court Square for “Bands, Beer and Bums” tonight after all, because we’ve got even more rain moving in. So I may get to play an extended session of The Window Game this afternoon.

One of the things we do on the Handling-Panhandling forum is upload photos of Downtown’s most aggressive bums, so that everyone knows to watch out for them. Many business download these photos and print them out. Well, Sunday night the forum’s photos paid off.

“Flower Man” is a panhandler who has been seen frequently Downtown. He typically picks flowers from public planters and tries to sell them to tourists on Beale Street, Second Street, and streets around that area. Members of the Handling-Panhandling group have reported being threatened by him, and they have reported seeing him carrying items that could be used as weapons.

Sunday night at Main and Monroe, a tourist couple was attacked and beaten over the head with a crowbar. The courtesy guard at a nearby building saw the attack and ran over. The attacker ran off as soon as he saw the guard, but the guard got a good look at him.

After calling for help for the tourists, he ran back inside to his desk, where his building’s manager had printed out photos of all the bums listed on the Handling-Panhandling site. He looked through them and identified “Flower Man” as the attacker. He handed the photos to the police, and they found Flower Man during the day Monday and hauled him in. If found guilty, that’s probably the last we’ll see of him on the streets for years. GOOD RIDDANCE.

Thanks to everyone who has joined the Handling-Panhandling forum and shared information and photos. We got one! Let’s all keep up the good work.

Legal stuff: Flower Man is presumed innocent until found guilty in a court of law.

The final concert in the “Bands, Beer and Bums” concert series in Court Square takes place tonight from 5:30 to 8:30. One of the best bands in the city, FreeWorld, will bring their funky sound to the gazebo in the park. So come on down! I’ve missed the last few concerts but will be at this one. Should be there by 6.

The Center City Commission, promoting this concert on their site, refers to Court Square as “the living room of Downtown.” Which is true. Unless you’re a bum, in which case it’s also the bedroom of Downtown, and the bathroom of Downtown. And the kitchen (CeCe’s Liquors) is only a half block away.

So come on out, listen to some good music, drink a brewski and get hit up for ’bout thirty-seven cent. Because on the Internet E-commerce takes place… but in Court Square it’s a whole different ballgame… there it’s all about B-commerce.

This morning I saw a flyer on one of the trolley stops advertising a new Internet cafe to open Downtown. The location was not listed, but it says it will be open late, will have food and drinks, will offer free Wi-Fi to paying customers, and will be the place to go Downtown for gaming.

More details available here: The Net Cafe of Memphis

Didn’t make it to Monday Night Football at EP’s last night. It was raining cats and dogs and it was just too soggy to get out. So I stayed at the Saucer and watched the game, although, a day later I can’t remember who played or who won.

Tonight, of course, is trivia night. Our secret weapon John D will be back, and he’ll be drinking plenty of Bud Light to fuel the endless fountain of knowledge that is his brain. I’ll get there about 6 and grab the rail nearest the door were we usually sit. Wonder who our waitress will be this week? Not looking forward to the start of Grizzlies season, as we have to get there a lot earlier to fight for our rail space when there are Tuesday night games. At least the team won their first home pre-season game last night. Hope that continues into the regular season.

But between now and trivia, got some work to do, so, see ya later…