(Edited Saturday, August 12: Bumping this post to the top to make sure everyone puts this on their calendar for tomorrow…)
I would like to invite all my readers to Sleep Out Louie’s this Sunday, August 13, for brunch. I intend to be there from about 11 AM to 3 PM, and it should be quite a party.
“But Paul,” you’re probably saying. “You’re at Sleep Out’s almost every Sunday for brunch. What so special about this week?” A fair question, I suppose.
What makes this Sunday so special is that bartender EMMA will be back on the morning shift, for one week only. I like all of the bartenders at Sleep Out’s, but most of the wild and crazy stuff that has made Sleep Out’s so much fun the past few months has happened on Emma’s watch. Only when Emma is working will you hear pearls of wisdom such as the following:
“Vagisil – rub it on your cooter!”
There will be mimosas, bloody marys, duck farts, steak, eggs benedict, pancakes, NTN Trivia, good friends and good times. It’s a can’t miss. It’s a Must Eat.
Got plans? Cancel them.
Afraid you’ll be too hung over from Saturday night? Learn to deal with it like I do. I’ll probably be out at Raiford’s drinking a 40 or at the Diamond drinking a PBR until the wee hours, but I’ll still make it to brunch. You can too.
Have church on Sunday morning? Skip it. God won’t mind. Seriously. Hang on, let me post a transcript of a conversation I had on AIM last night:
paul38103: so, god, did you hear about sleep out’s?
god: of course i did, i hear everything. emma’s back on for brunch this sunday.
paul38103: can i ask a favor?
god: sure, go for it
paul38103: would you be terribly mad if i told people to skip church and come to brunch instead?
god: fine with me
god: church would be more interesting if they served duck farts like sleep out’s does
god: and if they replaced the choir with music by kermit the me-damn frog
god: anything else i can do for you, paul?
paul38103: yeah, how about sending some more romanians over to memphis?
god: workin on it
paul38103: all right, thanks god, you’re a sport. gotta go, i need to clean the lint out of my dryer
god: ok talk to u later d00d
See? It’s totally okay if you skip church to come to Sleep Out’s on Sunday.
All right… time for another four and a half hours in Cubicle Hell. Tonight I will most likely be at the Saucer, playing trivia and listening to one of my team members complain because the waitress didn’t bring his Duvel in the correct glass. Have a good afternoon everybody…