Paul Ryburn's Journal

This morning I received an e-mail asking about the singles scene in Memphis.

Being a native Memphian (not to be confused with a native, residing in Mempho), I am ashamed to admit my bumfuzzlement at a particular situation for which I need your assisstance, Oh great wise and well-traveled one. Where does a late 40ish single woman go to meet single men. Now keep in mind these men cannot wear hairspray or have a swoop-over hair do. This particular lady has been single for nine years and is ready to go out and have some fun. I know there s fun to be had in Memphis, but have been unable to to locate it.
Your help in this matter would be greatly appreciated.

Signed,
Native Memphian

Not sure what to tell her… the environments in which I hang out tend to be full of people in mostly their 20s and 30s, so they probably wouldn’t be the best places to recommend to her. The one thing I can think of would be the Thursday night Madison Hotel rooftop parties, but they don’t start up again until April.

Any ideas for her? E-mail them to me and I’ll forward them on to her, and post them here in a followup.

First, a couple of restaurant-related items. Chef Michael Patrick of EP Delta Kitchen e-mailed me to let me know that he’s hosting a benefit dinner for Larry Lackey, the chef/owner of Cayenne Moon. Dinner will be held at EP’s on Tuesday, January 9 at 7 pm. For more info you can give them a call at 527-1444 or use their website to make reservations. His e-mail seemed to indicate that there will be more info in the new Memphis Flyer coming out today.

Sigh… I guess I’ll be getting another e-mail from blog reader “Stan” accusing me of taking payoffs from EP’s now.

I e-mailed a thank you to the Majestic Grille, expressing appreciation for the way they treated my group of friends and me on New Year’s Eve. I also repeated my compliment about the filet off their special menu being the best I’ve eaten. Got a reply from Deni the co-owner… she writes, “We have a new menu coming out next week that includes a peppercorn encrusted filet with a Dijon brandy cream sauce – holy moly is it yummy!” Can’t wait to try that. Soon as they get the new menu running and get it up on their site, I’ll post a link.

Congratulations to one of my favorite countries in the world, Romania, which along with its southern neighbor Bulgaria was granted admission to the European Union on January 1. Before they could be admitted they had to undergo rigorous screening to prove that their government was free of corruption. I hope they didn’t use the United States government as a model of how to accomplish that. Or worse, Memphis city government.

Congratulations to my trivia team The Rapscallions, who had their best showing ever last night, only missing one question and scoring 133 out of a possible 130 points (including 5 bonus points for ordering a German beer). Special accolades to team member The Nuh-Uh Girl, who correctly predicted that the questions would be a review of 2006, which caused several of us to study in advance. The victory brings our total to $175 in gift certificates, and we still have more than two months to accumulate more for the next party.

One of my readers e-mailed this afternoon to comment that if the Wolfchase Mall, Cordova Fox and Hound, and Bahama Breeze are places that East Bumblefuck residents would list as three of the Seven Wonders of the World, then SuperTarget should be on there too. “We East Bumblefuckers love us some SuperTarget,” she writes.

All it took was a drive on the I-40 to remind me why I rarely go to the mall. I had two different drivers tailgating about one foot from my rear bumper, while I was going about 67 and couldn’t speed up because there was a car in front of me only about a car length away.

The last time I went to the mall was back in August, when I drove The Romanian Sensation to the mall. That time traffic suddenly slowed from 70 to, oh, maybe 10 just west of Whitten Road. I had to slam on my brakes and pull into the emergency lane to avoid rear-ending the car in front of me. “No no Paul, please don’t wreck your car until after I go shopping,” the Sensation commented.

It’s a miracle that I worked out there for a year and a half and never had an accident on the way home. Really made me appreciate the short drive home from Midtown that has been the norm for me the past nine months.

And once I got to the mall, I couldn’t find anything to buy, except a 2007 calendar. So it was a wasted trip. There were some hot girls there, but most of them were jailbait.

Going to lounge around the apartment for a while, then go see my waitresses and play trivia.

Had a fun New Year’s Eve. Since it was a Sunday, I started with brunch at Sleep Out Louie’s, and hung around the entire day playing NTN Trivia. At one point in the afternoon regular blog reader Skippy made the mistake of challenging me to a trivia game, and I handed him a devastating loss. At 6 PM Crash Kole, Bobby Durango, and Smokin’ Lemon took the stage:

They’ve been playing together for several months now and their act has gotten really tight. I could definitely tell Smokin’ Lemon has been spending a lot of time practicing on the new guitar he got for Christmas.

At 8:00 we moved on to The Majestic Grille, where we had reservations for a table of 20. Their special New Year’s Eve menu delivered the goods – I had a gorgonzola crusted filet with port wine reduction, with au gratin potatoes and broccoli, green beans, and snap peas sauteed in butter. Absolute best filet I’ve had in this city. They also had a gorgonzola encrusted ribeye which people told me was even better… ya know, I never order ribeyes when I go to restaurants. Probably because I ordered them at Bonanza when I was a kid. And at the time I thought “well done” (meaning: horribly overcooked) was the proper way to order a steak. Maybe I should give ribeyes another chance in 2007.

A lot of pictures were taken, and this time very few of them were taken with my camera, so I don’t have a photo album to post. However, the picture of the night was taken by me – the Nuh-Uh Girl in a tube top:

The Nuh-Uh Girl and Chad tell me that they’re going to try and get “blogworthy” added as a dictionary word. Example: “Is that tube top picture blogworthy?”

Thanks to Patrick and Deni at the Majestic for a great evening, and also thanks to our friend Mikey for setting up the reservations and the champagne. Good times.

Didn’t make it to Big Foot Lodge on New Year’s Eve, but I heard I missed some interesting developments that night. One of my blog readers knows what I’m talking about. If anyone has pics feel free to send ’em to me – I won’t post ’em without permission, but wouldn’t mind seeing them.

Wasn’t awake on New Year’s Day in time to hear Mayor Herenton’s speech. However, I read some summaries later in the day, and the big news is that he wants to spend $30 million to build a new football stadium to replace the Liberty Bowl, with construction to begin in 2009.

I have to ask, WHY??? Why do we need a new stadium? Is the Liberty Bowl falling apart? Why is it that we can find $30 million to finance a new stadium, but we can’t seem to find money to GIVE OUR POLICE OFFICERS THE RAISES THEY DESERVE??? Isn’t that more important?

By the way, 5 years ago when the FedExForum was proposed, I was firmly and fully in support of building it, even if it meant raising taxes. I believed and still believe that bringing the Grizzlies to the city was a good move to make. But this is a different proposal. It’s not like we have an NFL team saying, we’re prepared to move to Memphis if you build us a stadium. Who’s going to use the thing once it’s built? Maybe if the Liberty Bowl were to be upgraded to BCS status, I could see it. But that’s not going to happen. It just seems building it like a waste of money and we ought to be using it to pay our cops better. If there’s a side to this story that I’m not seeing, please let me know.

Heard a rumor last night that the Hot Topic in Peabody Place Mall is closing, and they’re selling everything in the store for 50% off, and some items are marked at 75%. So that might be worth checking out if you like their clothing.

I’m still off work this week, so I think I’ll head out to the other mall today, the Wolfchase Galleria. I wonder how many residents of East Bumblefuck would list the Wolfchase Galleria as one of the Seven Wonders of the World? Quite a few, I’m sure. They’d probably list the Cordova Fox and Hound as one of the Wonders too. And Bahama Breeze.

Anyway, I’ll have the camera with me, and if anything interesting happens out East (which I doubt) I’ll take pictures. I’ll be back downtown in time for Trivia Bowl tonight.

Arkansas plays Wisconsin in the Capital One Bowl today, noon Central time. Go Hogs!

Several times last night people asked me, “Where can I go downtown to watch the Capital One Bowl?” and I was a little bit stumped, because my two favorite places to watch football will be closed at the time of the game. Sleep Out Louie’s is closed all day and the Flying Saucer opens at 5.

I’m almost positive Big Foot Lodge is operating under their normal hours today, and with their six big TVs over the bar, that would be the place I’d recommend. You’ll be able to watch the game in the company of some really good people, and have a good lunch and a 34 oz. Big Foot Beer.

Not sure if Huey’s and Dan McGuinness Pub will be opening at their normal times today, but those are some other venues worth looking into.

Jillian’s and Hooters are well-known as downtown options for game watching. Their food is more expensive than the places listed above and not as good, and they’re corporate rather than locally owned, but they do have a lot of big TVs. There’s an Arkansas fan club that tends to hang out at Jillian’s, from what I understand.

Me, I’ll probably hang out here at home and watch the game. The Saucer opens at 5:00 and it’s Pint Nite, so I imagine I’ll be showing up at their doorstep sometime around 5:03, and hanging out there until… um… what time does the Saucer close on Mondays? Also, speaking of the Saucer, The Dempseys will be playing there Thursday night at 9:30, so put that one on your calendar.

I’ll be back later today with a review of last night’s festivities, including a new TUBE TOP pic!!! So be sure to check back.

This is the sign on the barricade that the Memphis Police Department places at the entrance to Beale Street when they block it off to traffic. The last line reads, “NO animals/reptiles.” Um, last I checked, reptiles ARE animals.

I may as well have my mail redirected to the Flying Saucer, because this week I’ve been spending more time there than I have at home. I have to say, you certainly do learn some interesting facts from the people sitting next to you at bars. For example:

– I learned that Dean Kamen, who invented the Segway personal transportation device, has invented a wheelchair that can handle off-road terrain, can raise you to eye level for conversations, and can even climb stairs. So I Googled it this morning and found it – it’s called the iBOT Mobility System. Pretty cool.

– I was also told about a vehicle that is a combination beer cooler and electric scooter. So I Googled that too and found it here. This company should open up a dealership in Downtown Memphis, they’d make a fortune.

– And I even stayed up on the day’s news while drinking beer at the Saucer, learning that Grizzlies head coach Mike Fratello has been fired after getting off to a 6-24 start this season. Director of player personnel Tony Barone Sr. has been named interim head coach. I wish they’d throw a big pile of money Hubie’s way and convince him to come back for one more season.

The streets were packed yesterday with Houston fans and South Carolina fans in town to party before the big game today. Those South Carolina fans are something else – half of them would yell “GAME!” and the other half would yell “COCKS!” I guess I’m going to have to root for Houston, because I find it hard to support a team whose fans go around yelling “COCKS.” Also there was a really cute girl at the Saucer last night who was dancing her ass off and she had a Houston shirt on. So, yeah, I guess I’m for Houston, although “don’t care” is more my attitude toward the whole thing. And for those of you who think I’m a traitor for not supporting an SEC team, STFU, I’ll support an SEC team Monday when Arkansas plays Wisconsin.

Yay! According to WeatherBug, it’s 61 degrees out right now, which means I’ll be invoking my “rule of 60” today (if it’s above 60, I wear shorts). Time to go people-watch and drink some more beer.

Sitting here in the Second Street branch office with my Residents for a Safer Downtown Memphis co-founder Mike King… we just updated the news section of the RSDM website. To check it out, click here to go to the website and then click the “Latest News” link. We have details of a resurgence in downtown crime in the fall and winter, and our plans to have a meeting early next year.

Lots of activity on the streets today – they’re full of South Carolina and Houston fans in town for the big game tomorrow. I’m about to put the laptop up and head down to the parade.

Carabella, a gift shop on Second Street across from the Peabody, is closing after nine years in business.

As you can see they are selling their remaining inventory for 50% off. Carabella has a lot of unique wine and martini glasses, cookbooks, cocktail napkins, girly-girl gifts, wine openers, and such. So if you need anything you better hurry down there before it gets picked over.

BREAKING NEWS: Former President Gerald Ford died this morning.

Last night at trivia, our three-person team consisting of the Nuh-Uh Girl, Mikey, and myself tied the 18-member Weiss Ass team for first place. So Pete aka Trivia Guy did a tie-breaker question. He asked us, “How many live trees were sold in the US in 2005?”

We thought, well, of course a lot of live trees are sold for Christmas. But considerably more than that are used for landscaping. So we put in a guess of 300 million. We were told we lost, and were given the $25 second-place certificate, bringing our running total to $125.

After it was over, my teammates left, and since I’m off work this week I stayed and hung out for a while. One of the Weiss Asses came over to shake my hand. “What’d you answer for that tie-breaker question? How many live Christmas trees did you think were sold?”

“Wait a minute!” I said. “He said to you, live CHRISTMAS trees? He just said ‘live trees’ to us!”

I think we were robbed out of $25. Congrats to the Weiss Asses on a well-played game though. And congrats to us for keeping up with a team that outnumbered us 6 to 1 until the end.

The correct answer, by the way, was 32.8 million trees.

Be sure to check back tomorrow – a store downtown is closing and is selling its inventory at a discount. I promised my trivia teammates I’d give them a one-day headstart on shopping before I post it here in my blog. Tomorrow I’ll reveal the store’s name and location.