Big Foot

– If you’re downtown tonight, run by Big Foot Lodge between 11 pm and 1 am. They will be serving their 34 oz. Big Foot Beer in keepsake mugs to celebrate being named one of the best new restaurants in town. And the price per beer – 2 bucks. Try getting a deal like that anywhere else downtown. The place will be packed, I bet.

– Big Foot has a 4 lb. burger called the Sasquatch. If you can eat it all by yourself, with fixins, in one hour, you get it for free. Otherwise it’s $19.99. Okay, let’s do the math here. Four pounds in an hour… that’s a pound every 15 minutes… which is the equivalent of eating a Quarter Pounder every 3 minutes and 45 seconds. Now, if I’m really hungry I can probably eat ONE Quarter Pounder in 3:45… but I doubt I could repeat that 15 more times in a row. No one has won the Sasquatch Challenge yet, and I’m not surprised.

– Wonder when the WWE is coming back to Memphis? I’d like to see the Big Show have a go at the Sasquatch Challenge… he might be able to do it.

– They have some unique items on their menu… they have this thing called Poutine (pronounced poo-tin) which is “a delightfully unique cheese” over hand-cut fries, smothered in gravy. Haven’t had it yet but it sounds interesting. Next time I’m walking home drunk from the Tap Room, I’ll stop by and pick up an order.

– Their slogan for that menu item could be “order it and you’ll be Poutine all night long.” Maybe that’s why no one in the restaurant business ever offers me a job.

– I wonder if Vladimir Putin is still president of Russia? I haven’t been keeping up with the news lately.

– If my last name were Putin I’d nickname myself “I.B.” I mean, with a name like that you know you’re going to be a walking poop joke, might as well laugh at yourself first and take the fun out of it for everyone else.

– No, I haven’t been drinking today. Not yet.

– Also on Big Foot’s menu, I notice that you can get a 34 oz. Big Foot import draft for $6.50. Now, they only have one import selection – Newcastle – but still, that’s not bad at all. Down the street you’d pay $4.50 for a 16 oz. Newcastle draft.

– So there you go – a free commercial on my blog for Big Foot. They deserve it though – the owner is a super nice guy, and he advertises on Progressive Talk 680 so their politics are in the right place.

– All right, time to go outside and watch COGIC people parade around in their gaudy suits and dresses and hats. Hmmm… “female COGIC convention attendee”… that’s a possible Halloween costume for next year if I decide not to do the Beer Goddess again. Of course, when I do a Halloween costume I stay totally in character all day, so if I’m out and you wait on me, you can expect me to tip 27 cents on my $15 bill.

– Time to start drinking. See you later.